If I Could Turn Back Time
by 17daysgreys
Summary: Follow April's journey as she relives events of her past, in an effort to make things right. However, as she's resting in a coma, her present is still waiting for her. What will she choose, the life she created for herself or the one that is waiting for her?
1. Chapter 1

A/N: Hi, everyone this is a story inspired by one started by averylovesapril; they haven't updated in a while so I decided to roll with the idea. Here's the original if you guys want to check it out. s/12139418/1/Change-It-All

* * *

Six months ago, April would have wanted the stick to turn blue, now she dreaded its very existence. It was staring at her, haunting her every thought while she was in the  
divorce proceedings. She couldn't bear to look at her husband, scratches that, former husband because if she did then she would start to cry and that was not what she wanted to do. She had to be strong. He didn't want her, she had messed up too much and that was on her.

"Do you really want this?" She asked him. He kept his head bowed down and didn't answer, "Okay," she said quietly and she grabbed the pen and signed her name. That was it, they were divorced. She got into her car and decided to go on a long drive to clear her head and when she was about to get onto the freeway something came out of her peripheral and the world went black. When April woke up she was back in the hotel before her boards at the bar with Jackson, it was like she had been transported back in time.

* * *

"It's me and you right? We're still standing," she remembered telling him that.

"Yeah, me and you." He smiled. She couldn't help but think about what was going to happen that night, if she actually wanted it to happen at all. They had been so good for each other; he knew her body, her ins and outs better than she did. But they had also been so bad, they had to deal with things that most couples never get over, and they didn't. Was it worth it to go down that road again, could she make it right this time?

"Yeah, well Ted Stevens likes himself a redhead," Kyle, the resident at Case Western who April "stole" a job from drunkenly slurred to her. That was it that was the last straw, so she turned around and punched him straight in the nose.

"April," Jackson gasped, wide-eyed, he had never seen her take such control and it honestly turned him on a bit and before he could understand what was happening, April leapt forward and started to go at the drunken surgeon.

She screamed, "Yeah bitch, I wanna go." He had to use every ounce of strength he had to hold her back; she was kicking and screaming like a banjee, "Yeah dumbass, I'm actually the smartest one here, that's why I got your job next year." Causing Jackson to go, "What?" confused at her remarks, he was still having trouble holding her. The whole thing only calmed down when Dr. Richard Weber came to the bar and yelled at everyone to get to his or her rooms and if they didn't then they'd be barred from the test.

"Do I go for it?" April thought to herself, "Do I dive into this, again?"

April and Jackson walked up to her room, which was across from his. Tomorrow was the biggest and most important day of their surgical careers; their residencies had only been training them for this day. One day, one test determined if they were fit to be surgeons. April knew she had failed before, how much her co-workers ridiculed her, how she was called the dud by the incoming interns. It wasn't like it wasn't deserved, she panicked during her test, she even had to go to the men's bathroom to clean herself off because she was sweating so hard and that's where she found Jackson and they had round two in there. It was the greatest experience she had ever had in her life, second to marrying him. She remembered the way he spoke to her, he made her feel heard, sexy, tended to, his voice was soft and calm. He guided her, he took his time, and it was the most magical experience she had ever had. She knew sex was supposed to feel good, she had had orgasms before, but there was something about someone else being there, talking to you, learning you, it was something that a vibrator couldn't replicate.

"This is it, this is where you kiss him," she thought to herself.

Jackson was still on a high from what had happened in the bar, he had never seen that kind of side from April before and he had to admit that it was incredibly sexy. He had always recognized that she was an attractive woman, but he had put her into the friend box so long ago. Not that it was a bad thing, he had always been with other women and she was, well she was April. His best friend. The person he told everything to, he didn't want to ruin anything by having sex with her, by even thinking about having sex with her.

"Oh, my God. That was amazing," she panted.

"You just punched a guy," he responded.

"I punched a guy."

"You were freakin' crazy in there."

"Jackson we are gonna do this," she pause, "I-I-I can feel it." And then she reached in to kiss him, just like before, it was the greatest kiss she had ever had in her life. It was filled with passion, adrenaline, and also the knowledge that this kiss would lead to so much more. It would lead to so much good, a marriage, two children, careers they loved, despite all the bad that she knew would come out of it, it seemed worth it.

"Should I not have done that?" She asked, "I, um, I… if you want me to stop, just say so, and I'll stop."

Jackson couldn't deny that the thought had already crossed his mind that night, that he wanted her in a way that he had never wanted her before, "I just… you're… The way you're kissing me right now, you just… You're a virgin. You're a virgin." He tried to tell himself that he wasn't going to be the man she did this with, she had been explicit about wanting it t be with her husband, with a man that she was in love with. And yes he loved her, as a friend; maybe he could love her as something more, but now?

"Yes because my whole life since I was a kid, I had this idea of how my life was supposed to be, these rules that I was supposed to follow, but I'm not a kid," she paused, "I'm not the same person I was when I started my residency. And if something feels really, really, good, it can't be bad, right?" She looked up at him, "Jackson, it's okay. Really. It's okay." And with that he melted into her and picked her up, she wrapped her legs around him and started kissing him passionately.

"April," he began, "Are you sure you want this?" He was still feeling slightly hesitant, because he knew he wanted her so badly, his body was aching for hers.

"Yes," she whispered, "I want this." She pulled her shirt off over her shoulders, he had seen her change in the locker room many times before but he had never actually taken the time to look at her, inspect her skin, notice her perky breasts, everything that made a woman beautiful. She was a beautiful woman, and she was going to be his tonight. He had begun to undo her bra, revealing her breasts, and then he brought her to the bed, never failing to make eye contact. His quickly took his shirt off and their bodies collided, it was like they were meant to fit together. Their lips never stopped touching, and soon his started to make their way down her neck. He kissed her, causing her back to arch, and then he explored further down, kissing her navel and more.

"Oh," she moaned slightly, she was still slightly embarrassed and didn't want to be too loud, but Jackson honestly liked it. He liked hearing her cries of pleasure, especially when he licked her clavicle; she had gone crazy for that, "Right there." She had been used to his touch, for years, so she knew exactly where she wanted him to touch her, to lick her bare flesh.

"Jackson," she looked up at him, "Go slow?" She asked. She remembered the first time that they had had sex, how he had been so gentle, calm, considerate, and she remembered how good it felt. That pulsating feeling an orgasm gives you, how it runs through your body like a wave, a wave that she became very addicted to. No one in her life, not even her ex-fiancé Matthew made her feel the way Jackson did, ever.

"It's okay," he responded. His words for short, but they were the most comforting thing April could hear and that point, "I got you." He was on top of her and they made love, he put himself inside of her, it was unlike anything she had ever felt before. The only way to describe the experience was that it was incredible.

"Wait for it," he instructed, it was hard because that pulsating, sinful feeling she was having was running through her body, and then it was time. They orgasmed at the same time.

"Is she liking this," he thought? He had closed his eyes a while ago, it was habitual for him, but even so he couldn't help but imagine her soft skin, skin that he was holding. Skin that was brushing against his.

"Am I doing this right?" April wondered. She knew the motions, she was a doctor after all, she knew where the parts were and what their jobs were, but she wasn't clear as to how to react. Was she believable? Was she good? Would Jackson want to do it again? They finished he rolled over to the other side of her, last time she had instructed him to get out due to her minor freak out about Jesus, but this time would be different.

"That was, that was something," he leaned over to look at her. The sheets she had pulled over herself, confusing Jackson a bit, covered her breasts. He had seen them and they were amazing, he was confused as to why she never wore low cut tops because, damn.

"Stay with me?" she pleaded softly, last time she had kicked him out, making him feel, oh God she didn't even consider how he felt. She was too concerned with breaking her vow to Jesus that she didn't even think about him. That was the main problem in their relationship. Jackson never wore his heart on his sleeve and April wasn't the best at communicating, which was a recipe for disaster.

"Okay," he stated as he wrapped his strong arms around her petite frame. April had been used to sleeping with him, they had been married for a few years, she knew exactly how to position her body so they were the most comfortable. But being in his arms felt like home, it felt like she was coming back to everything she needed. She closed her eyes and thought to herself, "I love you, I'm so sorry." Right now, the man who was holding her was oblivious to all the pain she would cause him. All of the hurt, the loss of their son, her leaving, their divorce, and the man whose arms were wrapped around her was her best friend, nothing more. Right now, this is what she wanted. To fall asleep in his arms, with his chin pressed softly against her head.

He didn't realize that her body would fit so perfectly in his, he had his arms wrapped around her and he was spooning her from behind. He had never been this up close and personal with his best friend before, and it felt amazing. He smelled the top of her head, clearly she used cherry scented perfume, and it was the best thing he had ever smelt. If he could stay wrapped in her arms forever, he would, he would never move.

* * *

 _Present Day_

"What do we have?" Dr. Kingsing from Seattle Pres asked his team.

"Young woman looks to be about 30, really bad car accident. Keeps going in and out of consciousness."

"Okay, let's go," Dr. Kingsing ordered. They worked tirelessly on April, trying to make sure she made it. They stabilized her, but she was still in a coma, so they called her emergency contact that was listed in her phone.

"Hello, is this Dr. Karev?"

"Yeah? Who is this?"

"I'm Dr. Kingsing from Seattle Pres. We have April Kepner here, you're listed as her emergency contact?"

"I am?"

"Yes. Is there someone else that she'd rather have come?" Alex thought about his last conversation he had with April, and he knew that she and Jackson were not on good terms, so he decided not to say anything, "No. No, I'm the one you should have called. How is she?"

"Not great, she's out of the woods for now, but it'd be better if you got here and soon."

"I'm on my way," Karev answered.

Just as Jackson Avery was walking into the hospital, with his head sulked and looking towards the ground, he saw Alex Karev bolting out of it.

"Karev, where are you going?"

"Gotta run, emergency," he shouted back.

"You know the emergencies come through the E.R. right?" Jackson quipped back.

"This one's different. I gotta go," he turned to run to his car, "Oh yeah, how'd the divorce proceedings go, you and Kepner are officially divorced right?"

"Actually, no. I never signed the papers. We're still married." Karev wanted to turn around and drag Jackson into his car to go and see April, to see his wife. But, he didn't know if that was what April wanted, she loved Jackson more than anything but she didn't trust him. Karev made a split second decision, "Oh fuck it," he thought.

"You don't want to go in there, she won't be in there," he began, he didn't know exactly how to explain to Jackson that April was in a coma.

"Yeah I know, she usually likes to take long drives when she's stressed. It helps her to clear her head. But I know we won't be able to avoid each other forever," Jackson sulked.

"Jackson," Karev said with urgency, which caused the plastic surgeon to look up at him, Karev didn't even need to say anything more for Jackson to get the message.

"What happened to her?"

"She's at Seattle Pres." Jackson didn't even listen to the rest of Karev's sentence; he ran to his car and sped all the way there.

"April Kepner-Avery? Is she here?" He begged the nurse at the entrance of the E.R., "She was admitted four hours ago?"

"Sir, sir, I'm going to need you to calm down, what is your name? Are you family?"

"My name is Jackson Avery, and I'm her husband."

"Okay, she's up in the I.C.U., Dr. Kingsing is her physician and I'll have her come down and talk to you about your wife's condition."

Jackson sat in the waiting room, waiting patiently, or about as patiently as one could in this instant. What had happened to April, why wasn't he the one to know first, would she be angry with him for coming? The thoughts raced in his mind.

"Dr. Avery?" A young woman asked.

"Yes, that's me," he got up to face her, trying desperately not to cry, "My wife. How is she?"

"She's doing well, she has a couple of fractures on her right leg, which we expect to heal. But for reasons we cannot explain, she's in a coma. It doesn't seem like she suffered any head trauma, so we think it's her body coping to an emotional trauma. Physically she'll recover, but mentally, it's going to take time."

"Can I… can I see her?" He whimpered, he was scared to see her knowing that if he hadn't suggested a divorce, they wouldn't have been at that lawyer's office, and she'd never think he wasn't her husband.

"Sure." She lead him to her room, where he saw her lying peacefully, there was a cast on the lower half of her leg, but other than that nothing else seemed out of the ordinary, "Oh, and Dr. Avery I forgot to mention downstairs, but your wife is pregnant."

"Pregnant? That's impossible."

"She's about six weeks along, we're not sure if the fetus can survive the trauma she's endured, but we're going to keep monitoring it. If it comes down to it though, we will need you to make a decision."

"Crap," he thought to himself. Jackson knew exactly what decision he would make, as a medical professional he knew the risks and the rewards that came from a pregnancy like this. He didn't want to treat April like she was an incubator. However, he knew her, and he knew that the only thing she would have wanted would be to keep the baby, no questions asked. If she knew about this, which he had a sinking feeling that she did before the accident, she'd murder him if something happened to the baby and he caused it. He was going mad with rage over the fact that she didn't tell him, because he wouldn't have even brought her to the lawyer's office, they could have discussed things, been better, but now she was lying in a hospital bed completely unaware of the husband that she left behind who was holding her hand and crying.

"Wake up, baby, you've got to wake up. I'm so sorry, I never should have said all of those things, I need you April."

* * *

"That test kicked my ass," Karev complained.

"Well, I kicked that test's ass," Cristina challenged back.

"Okay, when do the results come out again?" Avery wondered, "I need to know when to book a plane ticket to Greenland."

"We're supposed to get e-mails by the end of the day," April answered, "But I'm sure you passed. You're an Avery," she smiled at him. Enough for him to notice, but no one else was the wiser. Their bathroom quickie had been lustrous, right down to him picking her up and doing her on the bathroom sink. It was better than last night because she knew what to expect and he knew what to expect with her a little bit, and he'd be lying if he didn't say he wanted to do it again. He wanted to do it over and over, just sitting across from her now and not being able to touch her hand, graze his hand over her soft leg, run his fingers through her tasseled red hair, was torture.

"Wait, I just got an e-mail," Meredith screamed, "I passed! Check yours," she urged Cristina. As they all checked their e-mails like nervous bunny rabbits, they all let out a relieved sigh; each one of them had passed their boards.

* * *

"You going to finish that?" Jackson asked April, who was dancing like a maniac in the middle of Meredith's living room. She had remembered this party from last time, where she had failed her boards and was drinking to drink the pain away. The embarrassment of being the only one out of her friend group to not pass to boards was too much to take, that she actually escaped to Moline. They all probably thought she had had a nervous breakdown, doubtful they would have figured out she and Avery had had sex.

"Yes," she chugged the rest of her mixed drink, she thought it was a gin and tonic but she wasn't sure anymore.

"You're really letting loose tonight," Jackson started to say.

"Jackson," she stopped dancing and grabbed him by the shoulders, partially for balance and partially because she wanted to be close to him, "We're no longer residents. We just passed the biggest tests of our lives, and I want to celebrate," her arms made their way around his neck and their heads were practically touching one another's. If no one else were in the room he would have kissed her right then and there, "Do you want to celebrate?"

"I, uh," she looked at him longingly, "Yeah I do." He took her by the hand and guided her out the door, "I'm going to take April home, I think she wants to call it a night," he shouted.

"Okay, night Jackson! Night April," Meredith called back. As soon as the two of them left, Meredith motioned for Cristina to come over, "When did they start doing it?"

"Who start doing it, Meredith what the hell are you talking about?"

"Kepner and Avery. Did you see them? They're doing it. I know it."

"Virgin Mary and pretty boy, no?" Cristina gasped.

"What?" Alex asked as he butted in to their conversation.

"Nothing, Alex," Meredith tried to say, but then Cristina interrupted her, "Kepner and Avery are doing it."

"Kepner?" he exclaimed, unfortunately now the cat was out of the bag and whatever April was hoping would happen with her and Jackson's relationship, privacy was not going to be a part of it.


	2. Chapter 2

A/N: Hi everyone, thanks so much for reading, reviewing, and discussing this story. Every review means a lot to me, so please keep reviewing.

* * *

The hours turned into days and the days turned into weeks, and all Jackson could do was worry about his wife. Yes, she was his wife. The woman who he would have stood in front of a gunman for. He loved her so much that he hated her for abandoning him for almost a year, she ran away from him and their problems all so she could heal herself. He was so angry, but he would give all of that back now to see her smile, to just have her open her eyes. He didn't think he was asking too much, he only wanted his wife to look at him.

"Morning, Doctor Avery, any changes from last night?" Derek Shepherd asked, he was working on April's case; Jackson had insisted she get the best regardless of if Derek was practically family. Everyone at Grey-Sloan Memorial was family to them.

"Nope, no changes. She's still the same," he disappointedly answered.

"She's going to come through, her brain just needs time to heal."

"I know," he sighed, "It's just hard. I can't help but blame myself."

"Jackson, this was in no way your fault," Derek tried to comfort him.

"No, it is. I'm the one who asked for the divorce, I'm the one who stopped fighting. She never would have been leaving that lawyer's office if I didn't summon her there, so Derek, it is my fault. You don't need to tell me anything differently."

* * *

He was kissing her roughly, as she was stripping her clothes off. He stared at her for a moment, he had never really looked at April Kepner in that way, not that she wasn't an attractive woman, she certainly was. But she was his best friend, she was April. And now they were blurring the lines of friend and something more. He didn't know what he wanted to define it as, because he was still unsure of what it was. He liked her, like really liked her; hell he was considering not choosing Tulane if it meant he got to stay in Seattle with her.

"Jackson, come on," she purred from the bed, "What are you thinking about?"

"Nothing," he shook his head before he started to kiss her again. She knew better than to ignore his brush off, at least that's what she had learned this time around. She knew she had to be more considerate of his feelings, so she didn't pry, when he was ready he'd tell her.

"Come on, Jackson, I want you," she was practically calling him and he as a man couldn't resist. He straddled on top of her petite frame and ran his tongue over her arms and bare torso. She was wearing a black bra with lacey inserts, quite the antithesis of the virginal April Kepner that he knew before, but it was hot. She was hot. She was so beautiful and he couldn't stop but feel like a giddy schoolboy because she was his, all his. His to do whatever he wanted to with his tongue and other things.

He lied with her in his arm, they had slept next to each other before, but that was when she was comforting him from his nightmares after the shooting. They never slept together intimately before the night of the boards and now tonight. It surprised him how well their bodies fit with one another. Her head was nestled in his chest and he lightly stroked her hair with his fingers, contemplating how right it felt having her here. Then his alarm went off and brought him back to reality.

"Shit," he murmured.

"Jackson?" A groggy April questioned. She had grabbed a t-shirt from his drawer and was wearing nothing else underneath, even at 6:00 a.m. she looked ravishing with her hair matted on one side and a bit of last night's eyeliner smudged under her eye, "What time is it?"

"Too early to be awake," he responded.

"Did I, did I fall asleep here?"

"Yeah."

"Oh, I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to. Crap, I gotta go and shower before Alex catches me."

"April, it's fine. Really, I like it when you sleep here?" He went to reach for her arm.

She turned around and looked at him, she looked at his perfectly toned abs and charming smile, "Well, what do you like about it?" she teased as she started to take her shirt off again, and then she wrapped her legs around Jackson's midsection.

"Well, it'd probably be easier for me to show you, rather than explain it to you." He picked her up and guided her to the shower; it was still too early for Alex to be up so they knew they wouldn't be caught. She quickly untied the string to his pajama pants and before she knew it scolding hot water was caressing down their bodies and she was shampooing her hair while simultaneously feeling Jackson thrusting into her. "I guess this is what it feels like to let go," she thought to herself.

April went downstairs to make herself coffee; even with a morning quickie she still needed her caffeine. She was perky April Kepner, but if she didn't have her coffee she was more similar to a monster than a rainbow.

"So, Kepner, what happened to you last night? Avery take you home," Alex wondered as he put a spoonful of cheerios into his mouth.

"Holy crap," a startled April jumped, "Alex you scared me! Why the heck are you eating in the dark?"

"Well I was going to take a shower, but it was occupied," he smirked.

"Oh my God," a mortified April turned around and put all of her focus into scooping the coffee grinds into the maker she didn't even notice Jackson coming into the kitchen.

"Morning," he said innocently, completely unaware of the lion's den he was about to enter.

"How was your shower this morning," Alex inquired.

"Fine." Jackson answered confused.

"Oh I bet it was very entertaining," Alex laughed before he got up and went to go get himself ready for work.

"Oh my God he knows, he knows, Jackson I can't believe he knows. We have to be more careful, what if everyone else finds out. This is not good." April was pacing around the kitchen like a madwoman; she was about to pace a hole into the floor.

"April, calm down. Who cares if they know?"

"I was a virgin. They will not stop asking me questions about it and I don't want to answer them, because," she approached him and danced her fingers up his chest, "This is between me and you."

"Just tell them that we're seeing each other, it's not that big of a deal."

"Are you ready to define this, Jackson? I mean we've done it a few times; I'm not that clingy. You don't need to call me your girlfriend or anything like that."

"Would you want to be called my girlfriend?"

"I'm not saying I wouldn't, I'm saying it's not necessary to put a label on this."

"Do you want to put a label on this?"

"Do you?"

"I asked you first."

"You're such a child," she playfully hit his chest, but she didn't know what to answer him. Right now he was putting the ball in her court, as he so eloquently always did, she was putting herself on the line. She was the one who was going to face rejection or the one who was too clingy. Yes, she was a virgin until the age of 28 and she didn't like the constant reminder of it from her family, friends, and co-workers. But she was still a woman who had some semblance of pride and she didn't like when people assumed that she would immediately fall head over heels for a guy just because he looked at her. And well, Jackson, he didn't just look at her, he looked at all of her, every square inch of her body. But he also looked at her mind, he didn't see her as the annoying, perky, ugly duckling that so many other people thought she was. He wasn't always the nicest to her, but he had weaseled his way into becoming her best friend and she his, and she trusted him. So, if she knew they were friends and she knew she could trust him enough to have sex with him, then she should be able to trust him enough to be official with him, right?

"Okay, how about this," she suggested.

"I'm listening, Dr. Kepner," he toy fully responded.

"We don't have to put a label on this, just yet. It's still fairly new. But what if we agree not to sleep with other people while we're sleeping with each other?"

"Dr. Kepner, I think I like your diagnosis, but I still think I'll need a consult this afternoon to make sure."

"Or we could do a consult now?"

"Or we could leave and go to work, now?" Alex piped in, "Do I need to move out now or are you two going to be able to keep it in your pants long enough to make it to the hospital?" April looked at Alex in horror, but Jackson couldn't help but laugh at the entire situation. He had been slightly disappointed by April's reaction; he really did want to put a label to whatever they were doing. But at the same time he didn't want to cause issues, he didn't want to scare her; the whole sex thing was change enough. But it didn't mean that he wasn't going to put on the Jackson Avery charm and convince her to consider him as more, Jackson Avery was a determined man and whatever he wanted he got. And he wanted April Kepner.

* * *

"So, Kepner, how's doing Avery going?" Cristina asked as she scoffed down her hot dog.

"Excuse me? I'm not, I'm not having sex with Jackson," she focused her gaze on her salad but she could still feel the sweat forming on her temples.

"Trust me, she's doing Avery," Alex said as he sat down with his lunch.

"Alex, I could kill you," April gritted through her teeth.

"You should have seen them this morning, definition of barf."

"Oh, what happened this morning?" Meredith asked.

"Nothing," April tried to divert the topic, "So, have you guys been hearing about your offers?"

"Oh my, Alex, what happened this morning?" Cristina engaged.

"They had sex in the shower, not really my style but I can dig it."

"You are going to need a new place," April shot daggers at Alex.

"Wow, Virgin Mary goes from being a virgin to having sex in the shower. How was your first time? Enjoy it? Jackson show you a good time on the carnival?" Cristina pried.

"It wasn't my first time," April quipped back, "And yes, I enjoyed the carnival. There are many activities to do at the fair."

"Wait, what? That wasn't your first time? When was it? Who was it with?" Meredith practically screamed.

"Hey guys, what'd I miss? Any good surgeries today?"

"You defiled a virgin!" Meredith smacked Jackson upside the head.

"April," he gave her a confused look, "What are they talking about?"

"Don't blame me, blame Alex," she turned to look at Alex, "Who's also getting a new place to live and soon."

"Yeah, yeah, I heard you," he scoffed.

"Okay, so no one answered the question about who took April's virginity," Cristina added.

"Cristina, it's fairly obvious! Jackson! Jackson did it! I can not believe you," she went to smack him another time but he stopped her hand.

"Hey, I didn't do anything she didn't want to do."

"Yeah, you guys, thank you for standing up for me, but I'm an adult. And it was me who initiated it, so you don't have to worry about me."

"Oh April, I'm liking you more and more," Cristina smiled as she looked at the young trauma surgeon.

"Uh, thank you. Oh, crap," April looked at her pager, "I have to go and do a consult. It was nice talking to you guys." She got up from the table and scurried out of the cafeteria.

"You better not hurt her, Jackson," Meredith warned, "Or I will gut you myself."

"You know it's not appropriate to make threats. And why would you ever think I would hurt her? She's April, she's my best friend."

"So, are you two a couple now? Are we going to have to report you guys to H.R.?" Cristina quipped.

"No, we're not a couple. We're just friends. I have a consult, so I got to go. See you guys later."

"They're so doing it right now," Meredith smiled.

"Barf," Alex added.

"Pretty boy is so in love with Virgin Mary, he's just too afraid to admit it," Meredith added.

"Definitely. Bets on who's going to crack first and admit their true feelings?" Cristina wagered.

"You're on. Fifty bucks it takes Avery a month to ask her out on a real date," Alex said.

"Come on, even Jackson's not that bad of a romantic. I say two weeks. Gives him enough time to get used to the idea of him and April being a couple, without going too fast for him. I put 50 on two weeks," Meredith explained.

"I say three," Cristina stated.

* * *

Jackson closed the door to the on-call room and locked it.

"Oh my God, I thought they'd never stop prying," April said.

"I know, I'm sorry. I know you wanted this to stay between us," he looked at her apologetically.

"It's okay. Well, now that it's out of the bag there really isn't much more we can do about it."

"Yeah," Jackson's pager buzzed, "Crap, that's Sloan. He wants to go over the procedure on Mrs. Hanson with me before he goes to Boise."

"Oh my God," April practically screamed, "Jackson I gotta go." She practically darted out of the on call room like the flash. She sprinted to Chief Hunt's office and like a mad-woman told him all about the plane.

"Dr. Kepner, what can I help you with?"

"Dr. Hunt, I know this is going to sound crazy and I know you're not going to believe me. But trust me when I tell you, something is wrong with the plane you're sending to Boise. Please, please just get a different plane. I did some reading and that company has had four crashes in the past month, four, and none of them were due to pilot error," she said all in one breath.

"Okay? Dr. Kepner, I can look into it, but they fly out in less than a week, it may be too late to get a new plane."

"Dr. Hunt, that plane is going to crash. I know it. Please, just tell me you're going to get them on a different plane."

"Dr. Kepner is you okay? Is everything alright?"

"Everything's perfectly fine Dr. Hunt. Please just consider what I said, I have to get back to the pit."

Everyone had known April Kepner to be a bit weird at times, but this was one of her stranger actions. Owen always trusted April, so he called the charter company and changed the plane that his staff was supposed to take out to Boise, he figured it wouldn't hurt to be on the safe side.

* * *

"Hey, how's she doing?" Alex asked as he came into April's hospital room.

"No change," Jackson responded.

"Man, you look like crap, you should go home, get some rest. I'll stay with her and let you know if there're any changes."

"I don't think I can leave her, not like this."

"I'm not telling you this to be nice, Jackson you need to go home, shower, get clean clothes, you're kind of gross."

"Thanks Alex. My wife is in a coma, what do you expect me to do?"

"I expect you to shower, get some sleep, and come back in the morning. I'll be with her for the next hour and then Meredith's going to come. We're here for you man, now you just gotta be there for yourself." Jackson reluctantly let go of April's hand then kissed her forehead, "I'll be back in the morning," he whispered to her, "Page me if there are any changes. And I mean any changes."

"I will."

It was the first time Jackson had been back to his place since the accident and it felt completely empty. April had been moved out for a few weeks now, so he couldn't understand why now it felt empty. Why now it felt like something was missing. He saw the throw pillows she had insisted on buying and he completely collapsed into it, held it to his chest and cried like a baby. Then he heard a knock on his door, he didn't want to get up to answer it, but he heard his mother's voice through the door.

"Jackson Avery, open this door, now," she demanded.

As soon as he did, she took one look at him, his eyes were red and puffy and he hadn't shaved in probably two weeks, "Oh my, baby, come here."

"Mom, what if she never wakes up? What if?"

"Shhh, don't think about that right now. Derek can handle this. She'll come through, I know it."

"Why'd I do it? Why'd I ask for the divorce? This is all my fault."

"Jackson, this is not your fault and you know that. This was an accident, one that you're not responsible for."

"She asked me if this was what I really wanted and I just looked at her. I didn't say anything. Her last memory of me; is of me ignoring her. What if she dies? I can't have that be her last memory of me. I need to tell her how much I love her, she needs to hear it one last time."

"She will."

"I never signed the papers, mom. As soon as she left the office I picked up the pen to sign them, but I couldn't. We're still married."

"Come here," she pulled him into a hug as she let her son sob into her chest while they both sat on the couch and he held a throw pillow to his chest.


	3. Chapter 3

April had never taken the O.R. for granted, no she had worked her ass off to get to where she was in her career, but she still saw it as a privilege to walk into the hospital, put on a pair of pale blue scrubs, and scrub into surgery. She was fifteen when she witnessed her first surgery, it had been a mitrovalve replacement done by Dr. Richard Carlson, at the time she was mesmerized by him. She'd never felt a high like that, the rush of surgery flowed through her, and then Dr. Carlson cracked the patient's chest and the smell of burnt skin filled the room. Most people would crap out on being a surgeon because of the smell; it was enough to make most people gag, but not April. No, this was the smell that made her feel alive.

Last time she went through this, she didn't know that the last time she scrubbed into the O.R. that when she scrubbed out she wouldn't return the same. She didn't return a virgin or a board certified surgeon and it had hit her, like a ton of bricks, that she had never truly appreciated the O.R., not like she had when she was younger. She always assumed she'd be back, do her fellowship at Seattle Grace Mercy West, she wasn't really considering her other offers anyway because Seattle Grace Mercy West had become home.

Meredith always talked about finding your family, and April never really put much thought into her comment because unlike Meredith, who grew up with Cristina for a mother and a father that abandoned her, April had both her parents and three sisters. They, on paper, were the picture perfect family. Dad was a farmer, mom a teacher, but April still felt out of place.

Of course she loved and respected her family, but they couldn't understand her; why she always had her nose in a book, why'd she'd take bananas with needles and threat up to her room to practice sutures, why she'd rather spend her afternoons at the hospital doing research than go to the dance with her sisters, they simply didn't understand. April assumed because she had this picture perfect family that she wasn't allowed to complain about it or search for another one. Because as bad as her relationship with her sisters had been growing up, April's family was way better than all of her friends. Slowly but surely, her friends had become her pseudo-family and now they were her full-fledged family. Although they sometimes treated her like the annoying little sister, they had stuck by each other especially after the shooting, that were something as much as her family tried to sympathize with they would never fully understand. They would never know the sheer terror she felt staring straight down the barrel of Gary Clark's gun. To this day it still sends shivers down her spine.

"April are you okay?" Jackson asked, bringing her back to reality.

"I'm good, no worries," she pleasantly responded.

"Okay, you just looked really lost in your thoughts, what were you thinking about?"

"Nothing and everything," she confessed. "I'm just nervous about picking my fellowship, I mean last time the choice seemed so clear," she slipped.

"Last time?" He looked at her inquisitively.

"Oh, uh," she stuttered," When I chose to come to Seattle for my residency.

"Oh, okay."

"So, have you made any decisions on where you want to do your fellowship?" She inquired.

"Well my mother and grandfather want me to go to Mass. Gen. they're utterly disappointed that the fellowship would be in plastics rather than cardio, but they're just going to have to get over it. Then there's Tulane. I'm not sure how I feel about the weather, hot and sticky haven't ever been my thing, but they have Mardi Gras and a kick ass plastics program. And lastly, there's Seattle Grace. Mark's a great mentor, but there'll be different mentors, to be honest, Seattle wouldn't be on my list if it weren't for," he paused.

"If it weren't for what?" April wondered.

"Shit," he thought to himself. He wanted to scream, "If it weren't for you." If it weren't for the impure thoughts he kept having for his best friend, but now as he was looking at her and saw how she was patiently waiting for his answer it hit him. She wasn't like the other girls. She didn't throw herself at him like a floosy. She never treated him like a piece of meat, she never pried about his family, and she had always treated him as Jackson. There was no pressure, no expectations to hold up a surgical legacy, nothing like that. All she ever wanted was for him to treat her like any other friend and now as her friend he had to be honest with her, about how he felt, so he took a deep breath and responded, "You. April, you're what's keeping me here."

April was surprised, she obviously knew that Jackson had feelings for her; they were married and had a son together in another life. But to hear him say that she was what was tethering him to Seattle made her feel like she was on cloud nine.

"You're what's keeping me here too, but I don't want me to get in the way of your dreams. Pick the program you want because it's what's best for you."

"I don't care about my fellowship I care about you, about us," he softly confessed.

"Oh," she gasped, "I just assumed it was sex." She mentally hit herself in the head, why would she say something so stupid?

"It wasn't just sex for me. It's never been just sex for me," he got up to leave clearly annoyed with April's lack of compassion.

"Wait, Jackson. It's never been just sex for me either," he was so relieved to hear her say that, he pulled her body close to his and kissed her, "So what do we do now? Date?"

"That's exactly what we do, Dr. Kepner," he playfully teased, "And trust me when I tell you that a date with me is going to be the best you've ever had in your life." He sounded so confident and sure of himself, so she licked her lips seductively and looked at him intensely.

"Oh is that so? Care to elaborate on the details?"

"And ruin the surprise, nope, no can do, just be ready at 8."

"Jackson, you have to give me some sort of idea as to what we're doing. I at least need to know what to wear," she pestered.

"Wear your green strapless dress, you know the one you keep in the back of your closet." He loved seeing her in that dress, the one time she tried it on for him and asked if it was too sexy, to him it was anything but. The evergreen color complimented her pale, milky skin and it made her red hair pop. The dress hit mid-thigh, which was the shortest thing her had ever seen her in, besides her running shorts, showing off her toned legs. All the running she had done around the hospital surely had its benefits. Then there was the neckline, at first he hadn't noticed it because her hair was down and covering it, then she gathered it in her hand and said something like, "If I did wear it, I'd probably wear my hair up." So, he stared a little more, examining the sweat-heart neckline that showed off her décolletage and slim arms. It was a dress that would have been enough to turn any man on, even though there was nothing between them a year ago when she had tried it on, he'd be lying if he hasn't pictured her in it the next morning.

"Okay, I'll see you at 8 then," she went to get up and go to the pit; it was probably going crazy in her absence.

"Oh and April," he called out.

"Yeah?"

"Wear your hair up," Jackson playfully instructed with a babyish smile plastered on his face.

Just as April had suspected, the pit was a mess. She kicked herself for leaving Alex in charge again. She didn't understand why the other residents hated the pit with such a passion. They all thought it was the second worst assignment, scut being the worst. It always confused April. She saw the pit as the breading ground for surgical cases. Sure, there were the stomachaches and complaints about not being able to poop, but the pit was the front lines, it sort of reminded her of Jordan. 

The memories of the hot sun were coming back to her now. The April Kepner who ranted about her family to a gunman, who failed her boards, who named her pig after her best friend and the person who took her virginity, was the last person anyone would have expected to join the army. Then she eloped with Jackson, got pregnant, and lost their baby all in the span of one year. She went from trauma surgeon engaged to quirky and dorky Matthew Taylor to being a childless mother who couldn't face her grief with her husband. She had become the April Kepner that went to war, who had joined the army because she needed a place to run away to. And it had given her some semblance of relief, but only at the cost of her marriage. She swallowed hard thinking about how broken Jackson would become and how she was the sole cause of it, she cringed at the memory of what was and threw herself into her work, "Karev what do we got?"

"Molly, aged sixteen, looks to have a distended abdomen, I've asked to do an ultra-sound and she's not budging."

"Well, did you ask nicely Alex?"

"I asked how I would ask any other patient."

April rolled her eyes at him, "Alex, this isn't 'any other patient' this is a teenage girl, who's probably pregnant and scared, did you ever think of that? God, your bedside manner."

"Fine, you take it then, it's not even surgical so I don't care. I'm gonna go up to peds and see if Robbins has anything for me to work on."

April pulled the curtain around and lying on the bed was a sixteen-year-old girl who looked incredibly scared. April remembered being sixteen, she remembered feeling like she could conquer the world at that age. That the only thing stopping her was the fact that according to the state she wasn't an adult. But she felt like one. Ever teenager does. But, she grew up, and a part of growing up is knowing that you're not always ready to take on the world when you think you are. Hell, she lost her son at the age of 30 and she couldn't cope with it, if she were sixteen she doubted she would have even made it to thirty. She looked at the girl again, her blonde hair was in a messy bun on top of her head and she was wearing leggings and a sweatshirt from the University of Washington. Clearly she was trying to hide her body. Her arms were crossed over her chest and she was looking aimlessly in the other direction.

"Hi, Molly, I'm Dr. Kepner, Dr. Karev told me you needed an ultra sound."

"I don't need an ultra-sound, I just need some antacids. I don't even know why I'm here."

April looked down at her chart, according to it Molly had fainted during school so they sent her down to the E.R. just to be sure, "Molly could you describe your symptoms for me?"

She rolled her eyes, "I've been feeling tired lately, I've gained a bit of weight, and I was puking for like a month straight in the morning."

"Molly are you sexually active?" April inquired.

The girl was clearly embarassed, she murmered, "Yeah." Molly was sixteen years old, and alone. No one was there to hold her hand, to give her advice, or even just to tell her that everything was going to be allright. It truly broke April's heart.

"Okay, well let's take a urine test and then we can do a blood-test as well. How long has it been since your last mensutral cycle?"

"Four months," she shyly responded. The nurse came in with the results, and they were positive.

"Molly, your tests came back positive, it does look like you're pregnant, but I can't get a good read on how far along you are without an ultra sound," April explained.

"Okay. " Molly responded.

"Okay, so I'm just going to put the jelly on your stomach and it'll be a bit cold." April performed an ultra sound on Molly, the fetus looked to be about sixteen weeks along, and she was careful not to show Molly what it looked like. She didn't want to pressure her into a decision that she was uncomfortable making. April knew the next question would be difficult, God why was this girl all alone?

"Would you like to keep discussing the pregnancy or do you want to know more about termination?"

"Termination?" The young girl looked at her belly, the thought hadn't even crossed her mind.

"Yes, we can terminate, help you through the pregnancy, discuss adoption, whatever path you choose we have the tools and personnel to support you. Molly had never thought about 'killing her baby', but she came from a strong Christian family who undoubtedly would send her to a convent if they found out. And the oversized sweatshirts weren't going to cut it much longer. However, God creates life for a reason and who was she to question His judgment? She was carying a life inside of her, she was a superwoman, but she was also sixteen. As much as she knew she would love her child, the little voice in the back of her head wouldn't stop nudging her about the perils of teen pregnancy and parenthood. "Good luck graduating high school, say goodbye to college, oh and that boyfirend you think loves you so much, will be gone within the first month." How could she raise a child, when she was a child. She had to do it for her and her baby, its life would be too difficult, it would always feel unwanted and she could not bear the thought of her child feeling unloved. She wans't the devil, of course she'd love her child, but she'd never be able to get over the regrets it will cause, the dreams she'll never achieve because of it.

"What should I do?" Molly asked, she was just a scared child looking for a little beacon of light on a path that seemed too dark to follow.

"I can't tell you what to do," April stated, "But don't think about your life plan, because that's always going to change, think about how a baby could enhance your life plan, or if a baby would make it too hard for you to become what you're supposed to be. It's your decision, there's no right or wrong choice, it's your choice."

"But what if I regret my decision?"

"If you thought you were making the best decision when you made it, and you made the decision selflessly, honorably, and honestly there should be nothing to regret. But you can't lie, don't have an abortion just to hide this from your parents or your boyfriend, have one because you feel like you need it, because you want to, the power is all yours and I know that is incredibly scary. But, I promise you, your parents will find out and they will be more hurt than angry, God gave you your mind, your heart, and your mouth use them wisely.

She sat in the chair for a minute and looked down at her belly again, inside of her was ten fingers and toes, legs, arms, and whatnot. However, she knew that it wans't her time to be a mom, and she couldn't bear the burden of destroying someone else's life.

"I think I want to termiante," she looked down at the floor, her feet were wagging uncontrollably, pat against the stirrups, pat again.

"Okay. Can you come back next week?" April was look at her computer to find Molly a spot, she wished she could have looked the girl in the eyes but hers were fixated on that monitor meticulously typing in every detail of Molly's. Her name, her weight, her address, her sexual history, her family history, all of it, because right now that's all April could do to help. In a small, completely inconsequential way, April felt like she was being a savior to this young girl, no more than sixteen, too young to know what sex is, let alone to be making a decision this massive.

"I'll find a way," she shyly answered as she perked herself off the bed quick as a hare and bolted out of that room, the room where she met her maker and she couldn't avoid her fate any longer. It's a shame we all have to grow up eventually, for most people it's a gradual transition, but for some it's like ripping off a band-aid or having a gun put in your hand and being told to pull its trigger.

"Good. See you then. And Molly," she called after the girl who was already a few doors down the hall, "take my card, call me if you need anything. But trust me, telling your parents isn't as scary as you think." The young girl sparked something in April, a need to help people in a way that she couldn't before she had never seen someone as helpless as Molly. She wanted so badly to give her a hug, that's what she thought she needed. Obviously medical professionals won't agree with this, but sometimes the best medicine is a good night's sleep and a good hug from someone who loves you. And it tore at April as she thought about the girl who thought no one loved her enough to listen to her pain. And April just wanted to scream at her and tell her that she's worth something that this is a just a misstep, that her life is not to be determined, not in the slightest. But, April was a doctor not a friend.

 _Present Day_

It had been three months since April's accident and she had still not woken up. She looked peaceful, calm, and serene. And he hated it. He wanted her awake; he wanted her to yell at him, to slap him, to do anything besides lie there like a corpse who couldn't be lowered into the ground. Her pregnancy had been progressing and Jackson was just starting to notice the changes to her body. Her breasts were getting bigger, her abdomen had distended a little, and her face had a slight glow to it.

"You got to wake up," he said as he rubbed his thumb against her hand, "I can't do this without you. And it's not even the baby; I can't do the rest of my life without you. April, I'm so sorry, please, please, please wake up," he cried. He had begged her every day for months to wake up, he thought that maybe she would hear his voice; his pleas and that she would come back to him.

"Jackson," Derek knocked on the door, he had been the doctor on April's case, and "Can we talk?" Jackson felt his heart sinking, he wasn't ready, it wasn't time, she still had time, and he knew it.

"Don't say it, Derek. Please don't say it," he begged.

"It's been too long, the April you knew may not be there when she wakes up, if she wakes up. It may be best to," he hesitated to get this next part out, "To let her go." Derek hated even suggesting that to Jackson, he knew April and cared for her. She had been a bit neurotic for his tastes, always color coding her charts. But she had always been kind. She went the extra mile for her patients, for her attendings, and for her friends. He appreciated her, whether he told her or not. That was how most people at Seattle Grace Mercy West felt about her. She was annoying at times, but she was also a great person, dedicated to the craft of surgery, no one would have wanted this to happen to her. It hurt to see her like this, lying in a bed unable to move, talk, or even breathe on her own. Derek knew that the odds of April waking up and being April again were a million to one, and as much as he wanted to hope and pray that she would beat those odds, as a doctor he couldn't sugar coat it for Jackson.

"She's pregnant," the words left his lips in a soft whisper, "She wants to carry to term. Then I'll decide."

"Jackson, she's not, she's not there."

"I'm choosing to hope that she is. She lost Samuel, she needs this, and I need this. This is what she wants, I know it. Now please, get out."


	4. Chapter 4

A/N: Hi everyone I hope that you're enjoying this story and want to hear/read more. I really appreciate any reviews/feedback. How would you all like the chapters, longer, shorter, with more dialogue, less? Thanks for sticking with me through all of my stories though; I couldn't do it without you!

* * *

"Avery!" Mark Sloan called.

"Yeah?" Jackson responded.

"Drinks at Joe's tonight?"

"Sorry man, I can't. I have a date. And don't you have that twin separation in Boise?"

"My man," Mark lightly smacked Jackson's shoulder, "You finally grew a pair and asked Kepner out on a real date. So, where are you taking her? And we'll be back by like 8:00, it shouldn't be that complicated. I'm just about to leave for that, take care of my post-ops for me?"

"I never said it was Kepner. And what else would you have me do Dr. Sloan?"

Mark gave him a disapproving look, "You're telling me that you've been best friends with her for years, you sleep with her at the boards, and you don't have the decency to take her out for dinner? Did I not teach you better than that?" Mark asked shocked.

"I'm kidding, of course it's April," Jackson smiled.

"Dear God, Avery, you almost gave me a heart attack." Jackson only smiled at Mark before he headed to the cafeteria.

"Have fun with Lexie tonight, Dr. Sloan, I'll see you tomorrow."

* * *

He picked April up at the apartment they shared with Alex, promptly at 8:00 o'clock like he promised; an Avery is never late for anything. That was one of the more annoying traits his mother had instilled in him, but it did have its advantages like now. He walked into their apartment and he saw her fumbling with her pearl earring and wearing one shoe. Her hair was swept off her shoulders in a soft chignon and her lips had a berry tint to them. He didn't say anything; he just sat down on the front steps and watched her get ready, mesmerized by her.

"Damn, where's my other shoe?" She complained, "I need to find my other shoe," she told herself. She ran to go upstairs to her bedroom, thinking it'd be in there when she saw Jackson sitting on the steps, "Oh my God is it already 8? I'm so sorry, I'll be ready in a sec."

"Take your time, this is actually kind of fun," he laughed, "I've never seen you more disorganized in my life."

"Well don't get used to it mister."

"Can I help you find your shoe?" She leaned her body in closer to his and took his face in her hands, "No, you can't help me find my shoe because if you do then we'll go to my bedroom and you know what happens in there. I won't be able to keep my hands off of you and right now I'm starving so I actually want dinner."

"We could skip dinner, go to the bedroom, and then order takeout?" Jackson suggested.

"And waste this dress? No Jackson, we're going out, you're just going to have to be patient and wait for dessert like any good boy," she teased. Oh God was she killing him. Just the thought of what was underneath that dress made him swoon. Well, he knew what was underneath it and he wanted to see it again. He hadn't touched her since this afternoon and he felt like he was in withdrawal, "This must be what it feels like to be in love," he muttered to himself.

"Okay, I'm ready." She called out from the top of the stairs.

Jackson stood up and faced her, the green dress looked better than he had remembered and her black hells made her four inches taller, now she came up to his shoulders, "You look beautiful," the words came out in a soft whisper and they made April blush. No one had ever told her she looked beautiful, not while they looked at her with eyes that sung passion.

"You're not so bad yourself. So where are you taking me?"

"Canlis, I figured you'd want to do something special for our first date?"

"Jackson! Seriously? Doesn't it take like months to get a reservation there? How'd you pull this off?"

"I have a mother with more connections than the devil, trust me this was the easiest thing I could have done. Anyways, your chariot awaits." He took her hand and guided her to his car, opened the door for her, and then drove to the restaurant.

"Good evening sir," the valet said to him as he got out of the car and handed the teenager his keys while the other attendant opened the door for April.

"My oh my Jackson Avery, you sure are sweeping me off of my feet," she swooned.

"Come on, this isn't even the best part, wait until they feed you, it'll be to die for." They walked into the restaurant which had wooden arbors lined with twinkle lights over the pathway up to the door and some heaters to keep the chilly evening September air at bay. He had sprung for a table near the window with a perfect view of the bay. Their table had a crisp white tablecloth on it and a single candle flickering in the middle, the rustic looking interior was perfect for both of them. It was classy, but not too formal where they'd feel pressured to remember which fork was the salad fork and which one was meant to be used to eat the meat. Sure, he was an Avery and he had practically been trained in the art of fine dining since he was old enough to hold a spoon, but April was different.

"Good evening sir, miss," he looked at April pointedly, "I'm Elton and I will be your sommelier for the evening, if you two would please take a look at our extensive wine list that'd be greatly appreciated," he paused while he gave them time to look over their menus.

"It says here that you guys have one of the best wine lists in the world, is it better than any bistro in Paris?" Jackson joked knowing April would find it hilarious, and he knew she did because she sort of kicked him under the table which caused him to jolt and smile like an idiot at the same time.

"Yes we do, we pride ourselves on our collection," he awkwardly responded, "Anyways, what will you two be having for dinner tonight?"

"I was thinking about doing the Peter Canlis Prawns, followed by the rabbit sausage, then the beef wellington, and lastly the soufflé," April explained to the Elton.

"And I'll do the same," Jackson chirped.

"Alright, well I'll start you two off with a glass of our sauvignon blanc from the Loire valley in France, then for your next course a new world red will be best I suggest a glass of merlot, which should hold your palette's over for the beef wellington. It's from the Efeste, upright, klipsun vineyard located in the red mountain of Washington and it's a 2012, very good, one of my favorites for sure. Lastly, I suggest a light champagne for the dessert, the Salon Blanc de Blanc is exquisite."

"That sounds great," Jackson assured him.

"Perfect, I'll go get those prepared for you and let Stacey know that you've decided on your meal."

"Thank you," Jackson replied.

"Do you have any idea about anything he just said?" April asked.

"None at all. Do you have any idea about anything that you ordered us to eat?"

"I literally just said the first things I saw, I'm used to eating hamburgers not duck at dinner. Reading the menu was like reading French for me and I was not good at that in high school."

"You took French in high school?"

"And all through college, I minored in it actually. I actually spent a semester there when I was a junior in college; honestly have to say it was the best four and a half months of my life. We lived in a small town in the south, so it wasn't really that touristy and it helped me to get the real French experience. I don't think I've ever felt more alive than I did there, except for well, when I'm in the O.R. at least or when I'm sitting here talking with you."

"You're a secret Frenchie and you've been holding out on me. Say something for me in French, please," he begged with his puppy dog eyes.

"Jackson, stop you're embarrassing me. I'm so rusty anyways, you wouldn't be impressed trust me. I bet your French is better than mine."

"I only know croissant and baguette," he laughed.

"Exactly the basics you need to know."

"April, I'm not going to stop pestering you," he took his shoe off and started to caress her leg under the table guiding his foot up and down her leg. It was smooth; clearly she had shaved for the occasion.

"I'm supposed to be doing that to you, mister," she smiled.

"Can't I treat you for once?" he teased.

"Jackson, peux-tu arreter s'il te plait? C'est bon?" She looked at him coyly but his foot was still stroking her leg.

"I didn't get a word of that, but it sounded oh so sexy. I'm pretty sure you could have told me to jump off a bridge and I would have."

"I told you to stop," she abruptly said which caused him to swallow hard, "Because I should be doing this for you. And if I wanted to talk dirty in French I'd just call you a putain."

"What does that mean?"

"Whore."

"April Ingrid Kepner, did you just call me a whore?"

"Oui, mais il était en français," she looked at him with a smirk plastered on her face as she took another sip of her wine. The meal was going well, their conversations flowed from one thing to the next. They talked about Moline and how Joe had just bought a new tractor after much convincing from her mother that his tractor from 1996 wasn't going to cut it for harvest this year. Jackson told her about how his mom was still wooing Weber and that he was still not over the scaring experience of knowing that they had sex at the boards.

"I still can't believe you needed your lucky pencil that day," she commented, "It's gotten you through everything Jackson Avery but even it could not save you from that horrible scene."

"That pencil had gotten me through every important test. My SATS, MCATS, intern exam. I needed it for the boards," he defended himself, "And the only help it could have been was if I had used it to stab my eyes out."

April practically chocked on her wine, "Jackson Avery I didn't know you were such a drama queen. Come on your mom's a single woman you can't be surprised that she," she trailed off.

"I know that. I just don't like seeing it. And you know my mother, she's just so open about those things, I'm sure she'll start texting me asking for me to talk to Dr. Weber for her."

"Speaking of your mother are you going to tell her about us?" April added as she put her hand on his, "I mean if you're not ready to I understand."

"I'm sure she already knows, my mother has her ways. You've seen her, I mean she met you for a day and she already bought that guy at the bar a drink from you."

"Oh my God, don't remind me. I don't think I had ever been more embarrassed in my life," she hung her head in shame, "How could you have let me go into the lion's den so blind?"

"Okay I'm sorry about that one. I knew she was manipulative with me; I honestly didn't like she'd do it with you. But damn that woman wanted you to get laid."

"Well, it's a good thing I did," April bragged, "And speaking of people who encouraged us to get together you know Dr. Sloan?"

"Never met the guy, what's his specialty?" He sarcastically quipped back.

"Stop it you, I'm serious," she laughed, "Okay, so one day I was minding my own business at staring at the surgical board, this was right before the boards mind you so, I wanted to see what surgeries there were and if I could get in on any for extra practice. Anyways he saw me and started talking about how you and I were study buddies and that we could be the other kind of buddies."

"That sure sounds like Mark. What did you say to him, I'm sure your face went beat red."

"Hey, don't make fun of the fact that I'm pale and unfortunately my emotions show all over my face, we can't all be blessed with a complexion like yours that never shows that you're blushing. Anyways, I told him that it was sexual harassment and he just laughed at me. Telling me we were both attractive people and whatnot."

"Who would have thought that Mark Sloan knew what was between us all this time?"

"Honestly, he kind of planted the idea in my head," she confessed as she took another bite of her beef wellington, "God this is good," she murmured.

"Care to elaborate on that one Apes?"

"Okay well this is really embarrassing."

"April, you walked around for three years with that damn red notebook of yours, trust me I've seen you at your most embarrassing."

"Says the boy who almost cried when he thought he lost his 'lucky pencil'. Anyways, I never thought of you in "that way," she gestured making air quotes, "You were always too pretty. And I don't mean that in a bad way, I just mean that in a way where like you're so attractive and you could have anyone you ever wanted so I never let myself think like that. I never let my mind wander to being anything more than friends and you know what I was happy with it, being a friend that is. Then Mark suggested we sleep together and I got to thinking, what would be so wrong with sleeping with you. First of all you're hot," she laughed, "But honestly it had so much more to do with the man you are. You're my best friend. You punched Alex for me, you defended me when everyone else called me weird, and you were there for me after the shooting. I guess it just dawned on me that you were everything I had ever needed in a person and I had just been too blind to see it."

"Do you want to know something?"

"Yeah," her lip quivered, she was a bit nervous that she had scared him off with her confession.

"I noticed you the first day I met you. The nervous way you clutched that red notebook like it was your lifeline. I could tell that you didn't come from a medical dynasty like a lot of us, I knew that you worked your ass off to get where you were. So, I assumed there was a bit of a spitfire in you. And then that night when you yelled at everyone for making fun of you for being a virgin something started to click. You weren't the mousey intern anymore; you were growing into a strong, kickass, and beautiful surgeon. And then when you punched that guy at the boards, trust me if you wouldn't have kissed me first, I would have been all over you."

"Do you think we've always been meant to be, but we were too blind to see it?"

"I'd like to think that two grown adults with medical degrees would have been able to see that they were in love with each other."

April legitimately spit out her champagne and it sprayed all over Jackson's face, "Oh my God I'm so sorry. I am so sorry Jackson, please I'll pay to get that dry cleaned."

"April, what the hell? Was it something I said?" And then he realized what he had said; he said that they were in love with each other.

"Jackson, it's nothing I really don't know what happened. I'm really sorry," she nervously tried to dab his tie with her napkin, her chest was right against his and he could smell her vanilla shampoo.

"I meant it," he confessed and her eyes looked straight into his, "I'm in love with you April and I have been for a very long time."

"I love you too," gushed. He grabbed her by the waist and sat her in his lap, he didn't care that they were in a fancy restaurant and that public displays of affection were not what Avery's did. Her arms were wrapped around his neck and his around her waist and he kissed her, passionately. His hand started caressing her back, and before he could even think they were on their way to the bathroom. They had gone one after the other as to not cause too much suspicion, so she left the table first. He met her in the women's bathroom five minutes later, making sure to check that the coast was clear of other guests.

"Are we always going to do it in bathrooms?" She teased.

"We wouldn't have to do it in the bathroom if you'd just let us skip coming to dinner," he replied.

"And miss out on that soufflé, no way mister." He unzipped her dress revealing a matching set of a black bra and panties. Her toned abs were expanding and compressing quickly, due to her heavy breathing and his wasn't any better. His mind wandered to the first time they had, had sex in a bathroom. It was right after their first board session and April was dripping sweat, her nerves were getting the best of her for sure.

" _I shouldn't have taken advantage," he confessed._

" _What?"_

" _Oh we should… we should go," he suggested._

" _Taken advantage? I kissed you, remember?"_

" _Yeah, but I kissed you back._

" _Yeah, but then I unbuttoned your shirt."_

" _Yeah, and then I… pulled up that skirt,"_

" _Yeah, but then I kissed your neck._

" _Yeah. And then I took off your shirt._

" _And I… But then I unbuckled your belt."_

" _And then… I slipped my hand up your back."_

" _And I wrapped my arms around your neck._

Say what you want about April Kepner getting tongue tied, the woman sure knew how to make a man feel something with just her words. She didn't think that she could do the whole dirty talk thing, but damn could she. Just the thought of her saying his name, whispering it into his ear softly and sweetly, made him swoon. He nestled his head into her neck as he reached around from behind for her breast. Bathroom sex was always dirty and a bit wrong; maybe the sheer thrill of getting caught was what made it all the more exciting. They had finished and after he zipped April back up and helped her fix her hair, since it had come out during their little romp, they made their way out of the stall. Unfortunately an older woman was in the bathroom washing her hands. She looked at them up and down and just smiled.

"I was young once too, enjoy it you two," she smiled before leaving the bathroom.

"Oh my God Jackson, she heard us!"

"I told you not to moan so loud!"

"I can't help it when you do that thing to my neck."

They made their way back to their table and asked the waiter for the check. It certainly had been the best first date April had ever been on and she couldn't wait to go on many more dates with Jackson Avery. She was really beginning to think that maybe this time things could go right, that everything would work out for them and then Jackson's phone rang. His face was in total shock as he dropped his phone to the ground and collapsed to his knees, April hated this because she knew exactly what was on the other end of that phone call, nothing but death and destruction.

* * *

"Jackson, what is it?" She worriedly asked him as she knelt down on the ground to try and console him.

"That was Dr. Hunt," he stuttered.

"What did Owen want, Jackson? Why would he call you instead of paging you?"

"The plane that took Grey, Robbins, Yang, Shepherd, Little Grey, and Sloan to Boise is missing. They think it crashed and they can't find it," he croaked out.

"Oh my God," she gasped. The old April, the one who didn't go into a combat zone probably would have collapsed on the pavement with him from the pure shock, but the new April was strong and almost machine like, she knew exactly how to handle a crisis like this. Back when the first plane crash happened she thought that it was going to be the second worst day of her life, second only to the shooting, but then she lost her son and realized that no day would ever hold a candle for the horror that that was. She reached out her hand for his and pulled him up, "Come on, let's get to the hospital and see what's going on. Let's not worry until we have to."

"How are you so calm with all of this? My mentor could be dead. Our friends could be dead."

"Jackson," she began, "We've been through enough tragedies I guess, and I guess I'm just used to it. Besides, let's not get ourselves worked up yet. No one is dead," she said to him, but whispered, "yet" under her breath. She had prayed that Owen had taken her advice on the plane and chosen a different charter company, why hadn't he just canceled the procedure all together she thought to herself as she drove Jackson's car to the hospital. Luckily it was only about ten minutes away from the restaurant.

"I'm going to head to the daycare to get Zola, Owen texted me and said to meet in the conference room. I'll meet you there," she suggested.

"Sure, that's fine." He leaned in to give her a kiss.

After getting Zola, April met Hunt, Jackson, Alex, Bailey, Weber and Callie in the main conference room.

"Thank you all for coming on a short notice," Owen began.

"Hunt, what is going on? You call me at like 11:00 telling me my wife's plane is missing," Callie anxiously complained.

"The plane went down about two hours after takeoff, the search and rescue team is looking for them," he tried to explain.

"And what are we supposed to do until then?" Alex yelled, "Wait here like sitting ducks?" he was angry, April knew he would be; that was supposed to be his spot and she knew the guilt must have been eating him alive.

"Dr. Karev, do you need to take a walk?" Owen asked.

"No, Dr. Hunt. What I need is to know if my friends are okay. If my mentor is okay. They've been gone for hours, they're all probably dead by now and if they aren't, they'll freeze to death out there in the woods." And with that a very angry Alex Karev stormed out of the conference room.

April handed Zola to Jackson, "I've got him," she said before excusing herself from the table.

She chased after Alex, which wasn't the easiest thing to do in heels, "Alex stop," she called out.

"I'm not in the mood Kepner so any of your God crap or your it all happens for a reason stuff isn't going to work. I don't want to hear it, I'm not in the mood."

She took a deep breath in, contemplating whether or not she should tell him. What was the point in coming back in time, in getting a second chance if she couldn't use it, if she couldn't help her friend in his time of need? Sure, Alex was an ass, but he was dirty Uncle Sal as Meredith had called him. Whether or not she like everything he did or said, he was still family, and family meant no one got left behind.

"They're fine," she began, "Meredith and Cristina are fine." He didn't say anything for a moment; he just stared at her dumbfounded. She knew that's what he needed to hear, he needed to know if his family was safe because that's what they were. She hadn't been there for the first two years of their residencies, but for the years she had been there she knew that those two women were all he had in terms of family. If they died, if anything happened to them, she was positive Alex would never make it back.

"How do you know that, do you have a secret connection with God or something?"

"No, it's not that, I just know okay. They survive," she stroked his back, "they survive," she whispers. He turns around and looks her dead in the eyes.

"Kepner, who doesn't survive?"

She didn't want to tell him, what if in this universe something happens and Mark and Lexie don't die. What if their plane landed in a different position and didn't crush Lexie?

"April, tell me! Who is it?" He roared, he grabbed her by the shoulders and practically shook her. Jackson heard the commotion and peeked his head out of the conference room.

"Lexie," she yelled back, "Lexie's dead. Lexie doesn't survive the plane crash and neither does Mark." April ran off crying and Jackson followed her.

"April," he softly said to her, "April what was that?"

"Nothing Jackson, can you please ignore it?"

"No, because Hunt just received a call and the only person to die was the pilot, and everyone else has really severe injuries but they're going to be fine. So, what were you saying about Mark and Lexie dying?"

"They're not dead?" Her voice quivered, "You're absolutely serious they're not dead?"

"April, why would I lie about them being dead? Now can you please explain what's going on?"

"Oh my God, thank you," she collapsed into his arms and the tears did not stop coming, "Maybe it's really going to be okay," she said thinking only about Samuel. Now that Lexie and Mark had survived the plane crash a little seed of hope had been planted in her brain that maybe her son just might survive too.

"Shhh, I got you." Jackson picked her up and laid her down on the on-call bed, "Go to sleep." He nestled in next to her and wrapped his arms around her sobbing body until she went to sleep, still unable to shake the feeling that something was wrong with April. She knew something; April didn't lie about things like this, and he was determined to get to the bottom of it.

* * *

A/N: Thank you for reading this you guys! Please let me know how you want this story to progress. I'm always open for suggestions!


	5. Chapter 5

A/N: Hi everyone, thanks so much for reading and reviewing this story. It means a lot to me! Please note that April is still in a coma, even if I don't mention it! Xoxo –R.

* * *

The plane crash had been devastating for all involved. Meredith and Cristina's injuries were the least severe with the former having a few cuts and bruises and Cristina suffering from only a dislocated shoulder. Derek's hand was a mangled mess and it would take a miracle for him to be able to operate again. Arizona's leg was still infected and likely would need to be amputated. Mark had severe internal injuries, but he was still expected to pull through. The worst of the bunch was Lexie Grey, whose body had been pinned under the plane. It took everyone's strength the get it off of her. She had a crushed pelvis and her legs were shattered, it took twelve hours in surgery just to get them straight again. She was looking at months of physical therapy before she could even think of walking again, let alone operating in an O.R. But each one of them had survived, the impossible. And April couldn't believe it. Before, Lexie never made it out of the woods, the piece of plane that had crushed her lower body was too heavy for Mark to push off of her, and no amount of adrenaline that surged through his veins had been enough. And then Mark had succumbed to his own injuries at Seattle Grace Mercy West a few weeks later. The Seattle Grace Six, as they were called, six went up only four were still living. But that was then, and this is now, and everyone except the pilot survived. Maybe this timeline was going to give April the second chance she had always hoped for, maybe good things could happen.

April had made her way to Lexie's room, the two of them had grown pretty close before the boards and April now cherished their friendship even more because in her other reality Lexie died and she never had the chance to say goodbye. It had been a week since the plane crash and after being transferred from Boise to Seattle Grace Mercy West, Lexie was doing well. She had had an initial surgery there to keep her alive and set her bones, but Torres worked her magic in Seattle ensuring that one day "little Grey" would be able to walk again and of course operate again. April felt terrible for Lexie, here was this young, promising surgeon with the world at her fingertips confined to a small hospital bed and forced to wear itchy hospital gowns.

"Hey," April greeted her friend softly as she politely knocked on her door.

"April," Lexie answered back, gleefully, "How are you? What are you doing here?"

"I had time between patients, just wanted to see how you were doing. How are you doing actually?"

"As good as I can be. The pain is pretty manageable, thanks to the morphine drip. Honestly, it's really the boredom that's getting to me. You don't understand how much I miss human contact, give me anything to go off of," Lexie begged.

"There really isn't anything that interesting going on in the hospital, I'm sorry to say," April said firmly.

"You're denying a cripple, how very unchristian of you April Kepner," Lexie quipped back.

"Lexie, there seriously isn't any drama!"

"Oh there isn't. So tell me where you've decided to do your fellowship and who's determining that decision."

"I don't know where I'm going and I'd say I'm determining that decision."

"Jackson isn't?"

"Jackson? Why would Jackson have anything to do with it?"

"Oh April, don't you think I see you and him and how you grab his hand or the way he looks at you. It's so obvious that he's in love with you. So, are you staying for him or are you going?"

"Lexie," April gasped, "I have no idea what you're talking about."

"April," don't lie to me, "Are you and Jackson seeing each other?" April had thought that she and Jackson had kept their relationship on the down low, sure it was fun to fool around with him and she loved the fact that he was her boyfriend and he couldn't keep his hands off of her, but she wasn't entirely ready to share that fact with the world. She loved the little bubble of seclusion that they had created for themselves, and unfortunately Lexie had just popped it.

"Fine, yes, we're seeing each other," she scoffed.

"It's about damn time," Lexie squealed, "I mean if I weren't in this bed Mark and I would have pushed you two together in no time. You clearly are meant to be together."

"Uh thanks," April responded.

"Oh come on," Lexie said exasperated, "Even when he was with me he had the total hots for you."

"Now you're just lying."

"Am I?"

"Yes!" April practically screamed.

"April Marie Kepner, when will you learn?" Lexie quipped back, "You are beautiful and smart and funny and caring, and God I sound like I have a huge lesbian crush on you, but I do. You do not think high enough of yourself April, why can't you get it through that thick skull of yours that Jackson finds you attractive?"

April shyly looked down at the ground, sure she knew she was pretty in a 'hey you look kind of nice' sort of way, and she could probably get a few guys to go out with her if she weren't so bad at the whole first interaction thing. But Jackson was different; he looked like he belonged on the cover of GQ, while she looked like she would be a cute soccer mom.

"No one's ever called me attractive before, I mean my sisters used to call me ducky," she admitted.

"Ducky?" Lexie asked confused.

"It stood for ugly duckling. See, I was the nerd who always had her nose in a book and refused to put on any makeup or brush my hair. I had glasses and acne and pigeon toes. I was really not a stunner. So, I guess it's just hard for me to wipe that out of my mind, because deep down I'll always know I'm no where near as attractive as him. And I don't want our entire relationship being people wondering why he's with me, you know? Like how on earth did I get him?"

"Because you're smart, intelligent, and you cook for him," Lexie laughed, "Besides what those people think doesn't matter."

"Logically, I know that. But it's just hard."

"I know, but hey look at me and Mark. Lots of people think that he's my dad, Hell he's old enough to be my dad and I'm still dating him."

"Speaking of which, how are you two doing?" April asked.

"You know, you'd think that it wouldn't take almost dying to confess your love for someone, but Mark Sloan has always been stubborn."

April laughed, but the thought crossed her mind at how beautifully romantic he was in what he thought were his last moments. Most people, when they die, don't get to be next to the love of their life to confess one last time the way they felt. To sum it into one sentence or two or three, what a lifetime of mind-bending, heart aching, stomach-turning love had felt like. And Mark had done that for Lexie, he had given his raw self. And although April knew that she and Jackson were not dying any time soon, at least in the timeline she knew, she wouldn't hear the way Jackson truly felt about her for a long time. But sometimes you don't need to hear the love of your life tell you that you were the love of their life, sometimes you just know, and April smiled at the fact knowing that Jackson, despite all of their differences, would always love her.

"But that's so romantic though," April admitted.

"It may seem like it, but when you have a few hundred pounds of airplane on top of you, your focus isn't on the romance. But I had so much adrenaline running through me, that he could have told me I was pregnant with quadruplets and I would have believed him," Lexie sarcastically responded.

"Still you're very lucky, some people wait their entire lives to find what you and Mark have."

"I know. But don't be one of them, April. You and Jackson have something amazing going on, don't let it slip through your fingers."

"Trust me, I won't."

All of the people who had been in the plane crash were for the most part, indisposed for the foreseeable future. Derek's hand was mangled from the debris that went through it. Lexie had described the site to April in detail and it made her want to vomit. The world's most prestigious neurosurgeon was reduced to nothing in a span of a five-minute freefell form the air.

Lexie had described to her the scene in the woods and it seemed like it had come straight out of a horror movie. Meredith's blood curdling screams for Derek could have been heard for miles and the time waited to find him felt like hours too. She described Cristina being disoriented and obsessed with the fact that she only had one shoe. She went into vivid detail regarding Arizona's shock and amazement at the fact that she was married to an orthopedic surgeon and here she was, in the woods, staring at her own femur bone. The worst part about the woods, according to Lexie, was in fact the silence. For hours they sat waiting for someone to come. And every time the wind rustled the leaves they'd get excited, hopeful that maybe they'd be rescued. They were damn lucky the rangers found them when they did; otherwise Lexie and Mark both would have died.

April Kepner had decided she wanted to stay at Seattle Grace for her fellowship long before the plane crash happened. It was home. It was where she had learned to become a surgeon and she felt like it was only right for her to continue on with her training here. And while she had great offers from UVA and Case Western, neither of them held a candle to Seattle Grace because, well, they didn't have Jackson. As an intern she never thought that she'd be making her fellowship decision over a boy, and especially one who she wasn't married to, but she couldn't help the fact that she was in love and she'd be a fool not to see where it would go.

"Kepner," Owen called, "Can I see you in my office please?"

"Sure thing Chief," she cheerily replied.

She walked into his office and on the white board were the names of the fifth years with their fellowship options. Meredith Grey had Mass Gen, while Alex had Johns Hopkins; and Stanford and Mayo were wooing Cristina, while Jackson had Tulane. Her name had a considerable amount of offers, from good hospitals, respected ones in the field of Trauma but then she saw it. Brigham and Women's hospital wanted her.

"Dr. Hunt, what'd you need me for?"

"Kepner, after your board results we've gotten more offers for you."

"What do you mean? I already have Case Western Reserve and Seattle Grace as my top runners, who else is in the running?"

"The Brigham, they want you. They're playing hardball too. Offering to implement your trauma checklist and to pay off your student debts. I really want you to stay in Seattle, well because you're my protégé," he smiled, "But I'll admit, Kepner, this is the opportunity of a lifetime."

"Wow," she breathed heavily, "Wow, just wow."

"So, will you consider it?" He asked.

"Of course."

"Great, because Catherine Avery is here to see you, she wants to meet you in the conference room on the third floor in about twenty minutes."

"She's here now, really?"

"Yeah, she's here to consult on a case with Weber, just paged me this morning that she'd like to do your interview too," he explained.

"Dr. Hunt, I'm not prepared at all. I'm wearing my scrubs, I don't have my checklist done, and I haven't studied their fellowship program at all. If I go in there now, she'll think I'm an idiot.

"April, the interview is simply a formality, you already have the job. They're wooing you; don't worry about all the extra fluff. And," he paused, "The binders you bring to interviews tend to scare people off."

"They do? I thought they showed that I was organized."

"They do, but they also show that you can be slightly too detail oriented," he said gently. "Just go in there calmly and level headed and everything will be fine. You're a solider Dr. Kepner."

"You're right, I'm a soldier," she responded.

Jackson Avery had been taking Mark Sloan's cases for the past couple of weeks while he had been recovering from his plane crash injuries. He still was weighing his fellowship options, but he thoroughly enjoyed the way his life was going now. He had a great girlfriend, great career prospects, everything seemed to be falling into place; that was until he saw his mother.

"Mom?" He asked.

"Baby, hi," she said as she pulled him into a hug.

"What are you doing here?"

"Consulting on a case with Dr. Weber." Jackson only rolled his eyes at that, he was still quite uncomfortable with his mother and Dr. Weber dating or doing whatever they were doing. He didn't want to think about it.

"That's good," he admitted.

"I'd love to stay and talk, but I have a meeting with April Kepner in about fifteen minutes."

"Why would you have a meeting with April?"

"Well, if you must know, we're offering her the trauma fellowship at the Brigham. Just coming here as a formality to show her the paperwork, explain the program, etc. She'll probably sign them this afternoon."

"What the hell?" His voice raged, his fists curled so hard he could feel his knuckles turning white.

"Jackson, calm down. April's your friend; I thought you'd be happy that she'd have this opportunity. That girl is a world class surgeon and I know Dr. Johnson and her would make the perfect team."

"I cannot believe you," he scoffed, "You're taking her across the country and now you're setting her up with some Dr. Johnson," he laughed slightly to himself, "When will you stop meddling in my life?"

"I'm not meddling in your life Jackson. I'm offering April Kepner the opportunity of a lifetime; that she'd be a fool to pass up. So, if you excuse me I have to get to my meeting."

"Mom," he called back with a hint of desperation in his voice, this caused her to stop in her tracks and turn around to look at her son, "Do you need me to say it?"

She walked back towards him and touched his cheek with the back of her hand, "No, baby, I don't. But if you love her you'll let her go, you won't hold her back." And with that Catherine Avery headed up to her meeting with April.

April knocked on the conference room door and inside was Catherine Avery. April had always admired Dr. Avery's work, but it didn't mean she wasn't afraid of the woman. She was pure force of nature with her ability to command any room with the click of her heels. April wished she could be more like Catherine and less mousey, but more so she wanted to be as brilliant a surgeon as Catherine.

"Good morning April, come sit," Catherine gestured towards the chair next to her.

April sat down, while Catherine pulled out some paperwork, April was surprised to see a contract laid out in front of her just waiting for her signature.

"Okay, April, let me get right to the chase. We want you at the Brigham; you're the perfect addition to our trauma staff. You're organized, quick on your feet, and most of all you care about your patients. That cannot be taught. I'll give you some time to read through the nuisances of the contract, in it you'll find housing assistance, loan assistance, and of course the pièce de resistance, the ability to implement your checklist into one of the largest E.R.s in the country. Dr. Johnson was so impressed with it, he wants to implement your checklist into E.R.s across the country and he wants you to head the project once you complete your fellowship." April looked at the woman with a shocked expression on her face, as Catherine explained the fellowship offer a bit more, April felt more and more inclined to take it. It was the opportunity of a lifetime.

"Where do I sign?" April asked.

"Right here." Catherine handed April the pen and she singed the contract. In two weeks time she would be moving to Boston and she could not be more excited about it. Now, all she had to do was tell Jackson and that was going to be the most difficult.

"He'll forgive you, you know," Catherine said as April put the pen down.

"I wouldn't forgive me," she admitted.

"He knows it's for your career. And besides, he always has a spot at Mass. Gen., if he wants to follow you he will."

"Thank you Dr. Avery."

"Call me Catherine."

"Thank you, Catherine."

"I'll see you in Boston in a couple weeks."

"Goodbye."

April left the conference room on cloud nine, until she spotted Jackson. He didn't even need to ask her what had happened, he knew. The joy was written all over her face.

"You're leaving aren't you?" He asked.

"Yeah," she admitted looking down at the ground, "Yeah I am."

He wanted more than anything to punch the wall, damn his mother and her meddling.

"Did you consider me at all? Because you were in there for no more than fifteen minutes and now you're moving to Boston. What could she have said to make you sign so quickly?"

"They're going to make my E.R. checklist national."

"Oh my God," he gasped, "My mother knows exactly how to play hardball."

"What?"

"She's unbelievable," he whispered.

"Jackson, I'm so sorry. I don't want to hurt you. I never wanted to hurt you. She said you could come to Mass. Gen. that we don't have to be apart."

"Of course she did," he angrily spat, "April, I'm not doing that and you know that. I will not, no I refuse to work at an Avery hospital. You know that."

"So, what are we supposed to do for the next two years?"

"This thing is new, it'll be a clean break."

"Jackson, no, you're not serious. We can make this work."

"We can, but I don't know if I want to."

"You're just saying that to hurt me, you're mad I get that. But this was an opportunity I couldn't pass up."

"I know that," he said frustratingly, "Don't you think I know that. I hate the fact that you're leaving, but I hate it even more that I can't even be mad at you for it."

She pressed her forehead to his, "I love you, and this doesn't change that. Please, I don't want to lose you." Her hand was intertwined with his, their bodies were pushing up against each other's, and it was quite an intimate scene. April knew they were breaking up, she knew exactly what was happening when his hand left hers and his eyes met hers, telling her everything she didn't want to hear.

"I love you too," he shyly said, "But," he paused.

"But you don't want to do long distance?"

"No," he admitted, "I don't."

"Okay," she managed to croak out, "Okay."


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N: Hi everyone! I know I had a few questions regarding the story and its context. Basically, every choice that April makes that's different is going to have different results and stray away from the canon storyline. There's a purpose to this and how the story is set to end, so please be patient. Thank you.**

* * *

 _Present Day:_

April had been in a coma for four months now and it had killed Jackson every minute that he had to watch her, lying there with machines breathing for her. She looked peaceful, content almost. Every free moment he had, he spent with her, even reducing his surgeries to be with her. However, sitting and waiting was more painful than doing something. So, after the first couple months he threw himself into his work. It was easier, because for a few hours he'd forget, then as soon as he'd scrub out of surgery it all came flooding back. The fact that his pregnant wife hadn't broke up and how no one, not even one of the country's top neurosurgeons knew why.

"Hey baby," he softly said as he entered her room. He pulled up a chair and sat next to her, before he gently grabbed her hand.

"Got a new book today, _Pride and Prejudice_ , I know how you said I should read it and not actually go off of just the movie," he laughed thinking about the time his wife teased him about his lack of literary prowess. And so, he opened the book and began to read to her, like he did every day.

" _It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a single man in possession of a good fortune must be in want of a wife. However, little know the feelings or views of such a man may be on his first entering a neighborhood, this truth is so well fixed in the minds of the surrounding families, the he is considered as the rightful property of some one or other of their daughters."_

He had finished the first chapter, closed the book gently, and set it down on the nightstand next to her hospital bed. The routine he had developed was timed to the very minute. He'd read for twenty minutes, not because he hated the story but because his voice would get tired from trying to add different voices to the characters, just like she would have tried to do. He figured she could hear him, so he needed her to know that he was trying, he was going to go the extra mile for her and put on the dodgy British accent even if it killed him. After his voice got a bit tired, he'd pull out his laptop and start playing some music. Normally *NSYNC would do, because he knew it was April's favorite from when she was young and April Kepner sure did love nostalgia.

"I still can't believe I never got to see the Justin Timberlake posters up in your room. I'm still a bit sour about you calling your parents and telling them to take them down before our visit," he teased. The memory came flooding back to him, like a rushing river during a storm. Not long ago they had, had everything, the happy marriage, the prospering careers, and a baby on the way. They thought they were done with tragedy, after surviving a shooting where their two best friends were killed and then dealing with the aftermath of the plane crash that killed both Mark and Lexie, they thought they had had enough horror for one lifetime. That was until their son, Samuel died.

Jackson could picture his wife's face the moment he told her that their son had osteogenesis imperfecta, it wasn't one of hurt or anger, but of pain. The color faded from her face, her eyes lowered a bit, and her lip quivered slightly, it was a face that broke his heart and he was the one who caused it. He couldn't do anything to save their son; there wasn't anything he could have done in his power to make the pain go away. And so, he had to let her grieve, in a way that he couldn't understand. Maybe he didn't even try to understand it because he was so angry at her for being selfish, for choosing a warzone rather than being home with her husband. But then she came back, and that pained looked on her face turned into something different, she didn't look hurt anymore from losing their son; her face was one of acceptance. And that felt like a dagger had been driven through his heart.

So, Jackson kept her at a distance. He was angry, confused, and he didn't want to be rejected by her again. Because, April Kepner was a runner, and Jackson Avery could not handle it anymore. He wanted her to stay; he wanted her to ask him if he was okay, he wanted her to be his wife. And she didn't want the same in return. So, he asked for the divorce. It was the hardest thing he ever had to do. Telling the woman that he loved, who he knew was fighting tooth and nail for their marriage, who was truly sorry for the way she had mishandled his feelings, that he didn't want to be married to her anymore. He simply couldn't trust her. Now, looking back on all those feelings, all the rage and pent up aggression, the selfishness, all of it seems so trivial now. Because here he is, listening to some old *NSYNC album and pulling up a rom-com on his computer to watch with her, while she lies motionless in a hospital bed with a machine breathing for her.

Jackson tried to ignore how loud the machine was, because it was the sole reminder that April wasn't here with him. She was hooked up to monitor after monitor, it was hard to find her in the sea of cords. He would give anything to have his wife open her eyes, to have her smile one more time, to hear her voice. But most of all, he would give his life to know that his wife could hear him. That somewhere, deep inside something in her brain was still working and April Kepner could hear him when he said he was sorry. Because he truly was, he had never been more sorry for anything in his life, he loved her, he wanted her, and no he needed her. And so, he sat and he waited, held her hand while they watched _Ten Things I hate About You_ for the fifth time this month and prayed that tomorrow would be a better day.

* * *

"I don't know how to tell him," Derek began, "I mean, look at him. I can't tell him, it's going to break him."

"Derek, you have to. He's her husband, he deserves to know," Meredith consoled her husband who was standing outside of April's hospital room.

"How do I tell him that she's not going to wake up, that she's never going to wake up? And even if she does, she won't be the same. She'll never be April again." Derek let a tear fall, he had never been the most fond of April, but he had grown to admire her strength and tenacity. She was a brilliant surgeon and an even more brilliant person and she certainly did not deserve the hand she hand been dealt.

"Derek," Meredith soothed, "If you're not ready you don't have to do this now."

"No, I need to." He tugged on the lapels of his lab-coat, straightening it, and knocked on April's door. Jackson looked up at Derek and he knew, he knew exactly what Derek was going to say without even having to ask.

"Please, just give me five more minutes of hope, then you can tell me, okay?" He pleaded.

"Okay," Derek softly answered before he left the room.

"April," Jackson whispered, "April, if you're in there please," he pleaded, "Please, come home."

* * *

 _April's Mind_

Breaking things off with Jackson had proved to be harder than the both of them had anticipated. They were screwing like jackrabbits in July and avoided any and all conversation about their fellowships. April had already begun to pack up some of her things in the apartment, having shipped them to the apartment Catherine found her near the hospital. It had started to become real for the both of them, not that they were willing to admit it. Three more days and she'd be getting on a plane to Boston and he'd be, well he didn't know where he'd be. Sometimes he thought he'd be going to Boston too, but then his pride always held him back. Other times he thought about going to Tulane, it was a different atmosphere, the plastics department was top notch, and he could be a new person there. No one knew about Seattle Grace Mercy Death, so the unfamiliarity would be very welcomed. Or he pictured himself staying in Seattle, working with Mark and being a part of the plastics posse, seeing Zola grow up, being involved in his friends lives. Seattle had become his home and it was beginning to get harder and harder every time he actually considered leaving it. However, April was also his home, and maybe it was time for him to grow up and go with her.

"What are you thinking about?" She asked as she looked over at him. Her red hair was in a tousled mess and his grey sheet was tastefully pulled over her breasts.

"Us. What we're doing. My fellowship," he admitted.

"Do you want to talk about it?"

"What is there to talk about, you're leaving," he breathed out slowly, "And I want you to. I really do," even he knew he was lying, "It's a once in a lifetime opportunity for you."

"I know it is," she sighed, "But I just don't know if it's worth it."

"What do you mean?" He turned over and looked her directly in the eye.

"I don't want to lose you, I already know what that's like, and I don't want to do that again."

"You've never lost me," he was confused at her choice of words.

"Never mind," she dropped the subject quickly, it would be too difficult to explain to Jackson that she and him had actually been married and well now divorced, "But what's really on your mind?"

"I don't want us to end," he leaned in and kissed her softly.

"And neither do I," she responded back, "But I'm going to Boston and you're?" She trailed off.

"Still undecided."

"Come on Jackson, why won't you come to Boston with me? It'll be like a whole new adventure, just the two of us."

"It's not that simple April and you know it." As much as she didn't want to admit it, she knew exactly what he meant. Jackson had hated the fact that he was an Avery ever since he could understand the concept of what it meant to be an Avery. He loved his mother and grandfather, but they could be difficult to deal with to say the least. They never gave him the time of day in regards to his potential career in medicine; they assumed that because he was pretty he wasn't interested in the family business. But he was, and he worked his ass off to get into Harvard Med and then to be accepted into Mercy West's surgical internship program. Every advancement he had made in his career had been on him, and he was damned proud of it. Now, this was his last choice and he felt like he'd be cheating the journey he had started by taking his grandfather's handout. The position at Mass. Gen. was always hanging over his neck and he knew he simply could not take it.

"I know," she sighed, "But where does that leave us? Can we try long distance?"

"We could," he started, causing her face to light up slightly, "And I'm sure we'll have the best intentions to keep in touch, call each other every night, visit whenever we can, but we're surgeons and our schedules control us. Eventually one of us will be too tired one night and we'll forget and then soon after that we won't even realize that we forgot."

"You are one tough cookie to crack Jackson Avery," April laughed trying to lighten the tension in the room, "So what do we do now?"

"We have sex? And we don't talk about this until we absolutely have to?" He asked.

"Okay," she bit her bottom lip ever so slightly which sent Jackson's hormones on the rise and he flipped her over and started to caress her milky white skin. If he could stay in this room for the rest of her life, with just her, the sheets, and his slow-jams playlist he would, but things are never that simple.

* * *

3 Days Later

April Kepner's plane left at noon, so she got up at seven to get ready. She went on a quick jog in the morning, it was the last time she'd be able to enjoy Seattle's fresh, misty, morning air for a while. Then she took a shower and started to cook Jackson his breakfast, eggs and bacon before he woke up around 9:00 a.m.

He was never an early riser; she still didn't understand how he got through their intern year with their 5:00 a.m. shifts. However, growing up on a farm she woke up with the sun and fell asleep with it. The morning was her sanctuary, it was quiet and serene, and it was where she could think without the hustle and bustle of the rest of the day. She loved it.

Jackson came downstairs in his pajama pants and a t-shirt, rubbing the sleeping sand out of his eyes. His five o'clock shadow was quite dark, April remembered that he hadn't shaved yesterday and she couldn't quite decide if she preferred him clean shaven or not.

"Morning," she chimed.

"Morning," he groaned back, she didn't take offense to it, it was Jackson's usual morning voice especially since he hadn't had any morning coffee.

As he made his way to the pot, like a zombie, April started to list off the day's plans, "So I'm going to leave for the airport in about an hour do you still want to come with me?"

"Of course I do," he said while sipping his coffee, "This breakfast for me?" He asked, nonchalantly changing the subject.

"You know I couldn't leave without you enjoying my homemade pancakes one last time right?"

He laughed, "It would have been a crime."

"That it would have been," she smiled as she looked back at Jackson, leaving him the second time was no easier than leaving him the first.

The drive to the airport was fairly short, the traffic was light since it was a Saturday and there were no sporting events going on in town. Both April and Jackson had hoped that there would have been traffic, something to delay them from their inevitable goodbyes, but God wasn't letting them have it. Jackson parked the car and grabbed her bag for her, before they headed into the airport, neither one of them saying a single word to the other, just simply grasping the other one's hand as tightly as they could.

"This is me," she said softly as they headed to her security concourse.

"I know," he looked down and had his hands in his pockets; he always did that when he was nervous, trying to hide his fidgeting fingers.

"I'll be back in a couple weeks, I promise."

"I know," he said again.

"Jackson, please look at me," she begged.

"I'm going to Tulane," he blurted out.

"What?"

"I decided to go to Tulane?"

"Wait, when did you decide this?"

"This morning, while you were packing your bag, Mark called and told me they upped their offer. It just seemed like the right choice to make."

"I see," she hesitantly replied, "Well, that's good. New Orleans is going to be great."

"Are you upset?"

"No, no, why, why would I be upset?" April knew she wasn't a good liar and now it really wasn't helping, she forced a smile on her face as she gently grabbed her boyfriend's cheeks, "I love you and I'm proud of you and I know you're going to do fantastic things there. I promise you I'm okay with it."

"I love you too," he muttered before he softly pressed his lips to hers.

"I have to go Jackson, I'll call you when I land. I love you." He held on to her for a few more seconds before finally letting go. Neither of them knew exactly where their relationship was, were they still together, were they not? The only thing both of them knew was that they were both leaving Seattle and were in love with one another, which only served to make things more complicated.

* * *

Jackson had traded shifts with Karev in order to drop April off at the airport, so now he was headed back to the hospital to work in the E.R. all night. The E.R. was April's place, her domain in the hospital. He loved the way she took control of it, how everything seemed to work like a well-oiled machine. It was incredibly sexy, and now here he was in her wheel-house without her. Before he headed down there, he needed to go and talk to his mentor, Mark always knew what to do even if he said it in the most unbelievably crass way imaginable.

"Avery, how'd dropping Kepner off go?" Mark Sloan asked.

"It was fine."

"You decide on your fellowship yet?"

"Yes," he answered.

"And?"

"I chose Tulane," the elder doctor was slightly shocked by the news, but overall happy that his student was going to be studying under his old mentor.

"And how'd she take it? Was she over the moon excited for my boy?" Jackson scoffed the comment off.

"She was fine with it, she said she was proud of me and that it was a good career move to be making."

"You seem disappointed Avery."

"What, no I'm not. What makes you say that," he replied defensively.

"It's your sparkle."

"My what?"

"Avery, do I have to explain this to you every time," Mark annoyingly stated, "You and I are blessed with dashing good looks. We aren't called the plastics posse because we're friends, which we are I might add. But we're called the plastics posse because we exude the sparkle, it's in our eyes. And yours are dim, where'd the Avery sparkle go?"

"It's on a plane to Boston with my girlfriend or whatever she is," Jackson answered.

"Wait, so you're telling me you two didn't define what you were before you dropped her off at the airport. Dammit Avery, if I could get up out of this bed and come over there and smack you myself. How could you be so stupid?"

"Hey, I'm not stupid. We're just not going to put pressure on ourselves to maintain something long distance."

"But you know that's not the kind of girl Kepner is."

"And what kind of girl do you think Kepner is? Please, enlighten me on the woman who I've been friends with for years and have been dating for a few months," he sarcastically quipped.

"April Kepner is the woman who goes all in or nothing. She wants the whole damn thing, the marriage, the babies, the house with the white picket fence. And by refusing to tell her how you feel, you basically told her that you want none of those things. You blew her off."

"I did not blow her off. We seriously just started dating, those things never came up."

"Of course she didn't mention them to you, that would have been creepy. I know April Kepner didn't date that much, but she knows common etiquette. That girl has been picturing her future since before she knew what sex was. I'll bet you a thousand dollars right now she has her wedding planned out in her mind and that wedding probably now includes you."

"I never thought of it that way."

"No, you didn't because you don't think," Mark teased, "Jackson, call the woman and tell her you're sorry and tell her you're willing to fight for the relationship."

"But I'm going to Tulane and she's going to be in Boston, maybe it's best if we go our separate ways before things get to be too much."

"Jackson Avery, I did not raise a quitter."

"You didn't raise me at all," he responded confused.

"Trust me when I tell you this, April Kepner will be coming back."

"Oh and why's that?"

"Because we're suing the hospital and we're going to be short-staffed."

"You guys are what?"

"We're suing the hospital. Turns out they're at fault for putting us on the charter plane in the first place, we've been working with our lawyers for a while and well, we decided this is what's best for us."

"And how would that make April come back?"

"You'll see Avery, you'll see."

"Alright," he sighed, "Bye Dr. Sloan."

"Oh and Avery," he called back.

"Yeah?"

"I'd reconsider Tulane if I were you."

* * *

Mark Sloan smiled to himself, he couldn't let things turn out like they had before. He needed to get these two love birds back together. He had absolutely hated watching them drive themselves apart, which they were doing right now. He had been given a chance to come back and set things right for April and Jackson, he was their knight in shining whatever. And what would be so wrong about him maneuvering a few things here and there to ensure that the two would find their way back to one another, the real one another.

* * *

 **A/N: Hi everyone I hope you enjoyed this chapter and the twist at the end. If you need me to explain in further detail about Mark's role and or realization about what's happening let me know in the reviews or PM me. xoxo -R.**


	7. Chapter 7

_Present Day:_

April looked peaceful, she looked like snow white in the glass coffin at the end of the movie, waiting for her prince to come. Except, her prince was already there, waiting for her to wake up, but he knew she wouldn't. However, it didn't stop him from holding out hope for his wife to wake up. It had been five months since her accident, and she had shown no signs of improvement, but Jackson refused to give up. Her pregnancy was progressing as normal, he still didn't know the sex of their child because he felt that was something the two of them should know together, when she was awake. Because, he knew, he knew deep down inside of him that she'd be awake. She wouldn't leave him to raise their baby alone, he knew her, and she was definitely not a quitter. So he had faith, that somewhere, deep inside, she was there, just begging to be let out. She would find her way back to him, he knew it. He had to have some bit of faith that it would happen.

"Jackson?" A familiar voice asked.

"Mom?"

"Hey, baby, how are you?"

"What are you doing here?" He left April's side to greet his mother.

"I'm here to talk to you, Derek called me and told me how you're doing. How are you doing?"

"Mom, I don't want to talk about it."

"Jackson," she whispered, "You need to talk about it."

"She's fine. She's going to be fine."

"Okay," she reluctantly responded as she put his head to her chest.

"What am I going to do if she doesn't wake up?"

"She'll wake up, I promise you. She'll come back to you," she assured her son.

"Mom, it's my fault," he looked at her with longing eyes, "If I wouldn't have taken her to that damn lawyers office and asked for the divorce, she never would have gotten into her car, and she'd never have gotten into the accident. She'd still be here. Talking to me, laughing with me, she'd still be here. I'd be able to tell her how much I love her and how much she means to me, knowing that she can hear me. Maybe this is my punishment; this is the cross I bear for letting her go. I thought that after she went to Jordan for the second time that I'd be unable to forgive her, but Mom," he gasped slowly, "I'm in love with her. And I don't know what I'd do if she weren't here. I don't think I'd be able to survive it."

"You can and you will baby. Just you focus on your baby and making sure you have everything set up for their arrival, have you done any shopping for the baby?"

"Oh my God, the baby. I haven't got anything, I figured April and I would do that us," he admitted.

"Don't you worry about it, baby. I'll get it all prepared for you. Just stay here and keep April company," she told him before giving him a peck on the cheek and leaving.

Derek Shepherd saw Catherine Avery leave April's room, and he decided to go and talk to her. Last week he had told Jackson that April's injury was irreversible.

"Catherine," he greeted her.

"Hello, Derek."

"Were you just in there with April?" He awkwardly asked.

"Yes, and my son," she coldly replied.

"Has he told you everything?"

"No," she said, "Is there more that I should know?"

"Catherine, this isn't easy for me to say, but April isn't going to wake up. She's never going to wake up. I can't explain it. After she gives birth, we're going to suggest that she be taken off of her lifesaving machines. It's hard to admit, but April isn't in there and she hasn't been for a while."

"Oh my God, poor Jackson," she gasped.

"I know; it was a shock to us all. April was, is," he hesitated, "an amazing woman. You don't know how sorry I truly am."

"And my son, how did he take this?"

"He didn't believe me. He's still holding out hope, and as much as I admire that it's not realistic. If April wakes up it'll be a one in a million chance and she certainly will suffer from severe mental and physical deficits."

"So, you're saying it's better if she doesn't wake up?" Catherine pried.

"I didn't say that," he searched for the right words, "But, if she were to wake up, she wouldn't be the same. She wouldn't be the April that we all know and loved."

"I understand, thank you Dr. Shepherd."

"My pleasure. Give Jackson my best."

"I will," she told him before the neurosurgeon left.

 _April's Imagination:_

Today was April's first day at the Brigham, and she was just as nervous as her first day at Mercy West. However, no one knew her here, except for Catherine, whom she had asked to keep her identity confidential. She didn't want people thinking that the only reason she was offered this fellowship was because she knew Catherine Avery, hell she was dating her son, or was she?

"Good morning," an unfamiliar voice chimed from the attending's lounge.

"Uh, good morning?" She replied confused.

"You must be Dr. Kepner, I'm Dr. Andrews," he extended his hand. He was cute, enough, April thought to herself, but he was no Jackson Avery.

"Nice to meet you," she said coldly.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to disturb you, but I'm the other trauma fellow, thought I'd put a face to the name. I've read a lot about you and you sound incredible," he nervously spat.

"Thank you. That means a lot," she told him kindly.

"No, seriously. You're like a trauma Goddess, if they have those, you'd certainly be it. By the way my name's Nelson," he smiled.

"April. I'm April Kepner," she responded.

"So, April, are you ready to be a fellow at the best hospital in the country?" He asked.

"More than you could possibly know."

"Let's go," he said giddily.

"Let's!"

She made her way to the E.R. her safe haven; it was unusually quiet for a Monday morning. Normally, people had gotten into accidents on their way to work or something else, but she wasn't complaining. She was excited to meet her new interns, finally she'd be able to teach new surgeons about the ins and outs of trauma without having people scoff behind her back, and then she heard an all too familiar voice, Catherine Avery.

"April," Catherine kindly greeted, "How are you?"

"I'm great, how are you, how's Jackson?"

"He's great," she admitted.

"So he went to Tulane?"

"No. Well, I don't know how that boy thinks. One day he's set on Tulane and the next he's going to stay in Seattle. I don't understand him sometimes," she confessed.

"Well, that makes two of us."

"Ah, yes, so are you two?" She asked.

"Together," April interrupted her.

"Yes, that?"

"I think we are, but it's probably best if you get your official answer from your son.

"April Kepner," Catherine shouted after the timid surgeon, "I'd like to think you know my son."

"I do, yes Dr. Avery," April admitted.

"And so, you'd know how he's feeling. He's going out of his mind not having you with him. I thought giving you the fellowship here would be a good thing, help him get his head out of the gutter, live up to his potential. But I was wrong, his potential isn't to be the next face of the Harper Avery Foundation, as much as I'd want him to be. It's to be with you. You do something to him, April, something I've never seen another person other than myself do for him. He lights up when he sees you, he beams when he talks about you, I can tell you're the only thing on his mind. So, dear, you can put your career first and you can think that this is the right step for you, but I'd like to think I know you a bit too and not being around Jackson is eating you up inside too."

"Dr. Avery, I," April stuttered, "I don't know what to say. I have to go."

"April," Catherine called once again, "Don't make the same mistake I did." And with that she left the young redhead to her own devices.

The plane crash was the elephant in the room; everyone at the hospital was talking about it. The whispers were constant, where nurses were gossiping about the hospital shutting down and x-ray techs were moaning about the surgeons who decided to sue the hospital. Well, Jackson thought his friends had a right to get justice for what happened to them, but he still was nervous about his job. Sure, he could go out to Mass Gen., be with April which would be a plus, but he'd have to swallow his pride and as a thirty-year old man he wasn't sure if he's ready to do that, yet.

"Avery," Mark called from down the hall.

"Morning, Dr. Sloan," he replied.

"We need you in the third floor conference room in twenty minutes." Jackson was confused, the third floor conference room was used only for legal litigation and as far as Jackson knew he wasn't under any type of investigation from the hospital.

He shakily responded, hands in his pockets fidgeting with whatever was in them, "Okay."

"Avery, welcome in," Derek said as he closed the door behind Jackson.

"Good morning everyone."

"So, you're probably wondering why we asked you here," Callie added.

"Yeah, I'm a bit confused.

"So, you know we're suing the hospital, well now we want to buy it. We've pooled our money and we're still a bit short, that's where you come in," Arizona said.

"Me?"

"Yes, you. Jackson Avery," Cristina put emphasis on the Avery part.

"Oh no, no, no, no. I'm not a part of the foundation, that's my mother. You're going to have to talk with my mother."

"Oh, we already did, champ," Mark, stated, "And if you're up to it you're now the owner of 51% of this hospital and the head of the board. You just need to sign on the dotted line."

"And why would I do that?" he begrudgingly asked.

"Because you walk around here, sulking like a baby deer who's been kicked when it's down," Meredith gently said, tucking her blond hair behind her ear, "I never was the biggest fan of April's, but Avery there's a light that's missing."

"I agree," Lexie, added, "You're nothing without April. So, if you were on the board you could offer her a job here that would rival hers in Massachusetts. And there's no way she wouldn't come back to you."

"Where do I sign?" Jackson asked, causing the rest of the room to beam with glee.

This was it; today Jackson Avery was flying out to Massachusets, for once not to visit his family, but to get his girlfriend or April back. He didn't know what he was labeling them, but he wanted so badly to hold her in his arms. It had been six weeks since he'd seen her; he needed her more than anything.

Jackson Avery felt nervous about visiting April; they hadn't left things too well. They had been communicating via Skype every now and then, and were still technically a couple. At least he thought so. He wasn't seeing anyone else, he only hoped she wasn't either. But the two of them hadn't really talked about it, put a label on what they were. Was she expecting something from him? Was he from her? It was all so confusing and all he really wanted was for her to come home to Seattle, that's why he was here to surprise her.

"Hi, could you please page Dr. Kepner for me?" He politely asked the nurse.

"Sure, um?" she asked.

"Jackson Avery."

After the plane crash, the victims sued the hospital and the Harper Avery Foundation had to step in to provide the money in order for the hospital to not shut down. So, he was now sitting as the head of the board of directors of Seattle Grace Mercy West Hospital and his first order of business was hiring April Kepner back.

"Someone paged for me?" April asked the nurse. Jackson just stared at her, still mesmerized by her beauty and the glow that she had about her. He was still in love with that woman; he could feel it in his bones.

"Yes, that gentleman over there," she pointed to Jackson. A smile immediately came over April's face.

"What are you doing here?" She practically squealed.

"I, your very rich and very intelligent boyfriend have a job proposition for you," he proposed.

"Jackson, I'm not going to be your doctor," she rolled her eyes.

"Not that, April. No, a real job, one in Seattle. I want you to come back to Seattle."

"Jackson, I don't know. I'm just getting settled her and the protocol and."

"But I'm not here. And you can do your protocol from anywhere; I'll give you all the tools you need. Anything you want, just ask. I just need you to come home."

"What's going on?"

"I own the hospital now, well 51% of it actually."

"You're kidding right?"

"I wish I were. My mother bought it for me."

"Wow, I didn't know Catherine Avery had it in her, damn she's good."

"Manipulative is what you mean, right?"

"Well, that too."

"So, will you come back?"

"Yes. Yes I will," she beamed, knowing that she'd have to come back eventually. She was having his baby, after all.


End file.
